Government has done me wrong, I’m mad about that.
And it makes me feel like I don’t belong, I’m mad about that.
It’s making life a misery, you wouldn’t have taken the liberty
Government has done me wrong, I’m mad about that.
Good God, almighty
There’s no denying life
Would be better if I never ever had to live with you,
Blue, it’s a color so cruel
* weren’t the old passports black?
Gatz says
The passport cover thing is some kind of trigger issue for Brextards when I don’t think most people give a tupenny one either way. Still, it seems to have made them happy.
I’m a trifle baffled that they seem so delighted at the thought of Remainers wailing and gnashing their teeth over a blue passport rather than a burgundy one (see the comments in the Telegraph for examples) but I wouldn’t want to deny some festive joy to the twitches of their little black hearts.
deramdaze says
I like to think I’m pretty good on social history but who knew that passports used to be blue, red or pink with yellow spots?
Besides, whisper it, I rather like burgundy.
My passport runs out soon and, while it’s a useful tool for quick identity, I’m not sure I’m that bothered about renewing it. Nor am I inclined to ‘make a point’ by trying to get an Irish one.
Martin Hairnet says
On Monday, and for the first time in months, I was feeling quietly optimistic about Brexit. I sensed a sensible compromise was emerging. Something that might appease moderates on both sides. A modified single market with some kind of fudge on migration. I even wrote a long post on Facebook, explaining my reasoning.
By Tuesday I was in despair again, as the foundations of my optimism fell away with another round of ugly headlines. I am starting to worry about the effect of Brexit on the nation’s psyche. I don’t think we can underestimate the psychological impact of these negotiations on the population. They can exact a toll, and we haven’t even left yet. I’m shocked at how much the government and opposition are failing to project the seriousness of the situation. There’s almost a cruel indifference to the millions hoping for some kind of clarity.
I saw the passport thing and just had to let it go. I’m sure it’s important for some folks. But I can’t deal with this shit any more. The mudslinging will ony make things worse.
ganglesprocket says
Imagine being so small minded that the colour of a fucking passport was important to you? Imagine being so lacking in joy that a future change in passport colour made you actually happy (ish)?
Martin Hairnet says
I find that if I see it as a symbolic change, a small rebranding exercise, I don’t get so wound up about it. I’m sure there are some out there who are aggressively pumping their red and white fists in “Fuck you, EU” celebrations, but I think they are in a minority.
bobness says
Yep, I’ll go for that one. WT acfual F is going on that some numpty on the radio this morning was crowing that this is a key moment in “taking back control”, and many people “fondly remember” blue passports. Presumably like they fondly remember power cuts, rubbish in the streets, endemic racism, the 3 day week and rickets.
I’m 49, gave had a passport since I was 18 (my first passport was a temporary one, remember them?) and honestly never knew passports used to be blue.
Surreal.
Martin Hairnet says
EU loving Croatia still has a blue passport. Blue passports are not banned by the EU and are not incompatible with EU membership. But it’s a red flag to some folks.
johnw says
Well I’m 59 and I’ve never had anything but a red one. I’ve got one of my dad’s old black ones (is it actually very dark blue? Who cares? ) it’s got my mum added to it so she didn’t need to apply for one in her own name!
I assume nobody had been daft enough to suggest they also revert to their old size with a stiff cover so that they won’t work in any of those nasty foreign machines!
I quite like the idea of having a new colour each time it’s renewed.
DogFacedBoy says
You know somewhere someone is busy creating burgundy covers you can slip over the blue one
In fact I wouldn’t be surprised if Etsy sellers already are
johnw says
I’m pretty sure such a thing existed when the red passports started. Seems a lot less effort than leaving the EU! I would think that free issuing a blue cover to everyone that wants one would cost less than the brexit costs.
Martin Hairnet says
Yes, I think my father had one of those. But it was gray leather. My parents were also keen on putting those little woollen bobble hats over their toilet rolls.
Moose the Mooche says
You’re missing the point. It’s not that people who want blue passports should have them – it’s that people who want burgundy passports shouldn’t have them.
Similarly, its not enough that some people want to live in a small-minded backwater called Little England – we all have to.
Anyway, I don’t understand the need for passports – doesn’t that suggest a desire to go abroad? TRAITORS!!!
Alias says
Exactly, and wherever they go with their passports will be full of fucking foreigners anyway.
DogFacedBoy says
Harry’s Full English Bar on the Costa Plonka has none of them foreigners. Except Pedro and you just shout “egg m chips” at him
salwarpe says
Yes, that’s my feeling. Brexit supporters (Brexiteers? Faarrrk orf!) routinely talk about ‘the will of the people’, ‘the British people voted to leave’. Did we heckaslike. A narrow majority pipped a large minority, and many didn’t vote at all. Hardly a mandate for claiming everyone’s on your side (against traitorous remainer MPs).
Pace more senior members of this blog, it’s Mail-fed disgruntled boomers ‘taking back control’ from younger generations, the past plundering the future.
mikethep says
I used to have a dark blue one. If they’re really interested in Making Britain Great Again they should have a little window at the top where your name is painstakingly handwritten by a Passport Office penpusher (ha!) in blue ink.
What-fresh-hell-is-this dept: the Sun is calling them “Old Blue”.
Moose the Mooche says
Roger McGuinn’s dog? How appropriate!
mikethep says
Since it’s you, how about this for the (I’d guess) rarely sung final verse according to Google?
Now, when I get to heaven, first thing I’ll do.
When I get to heaven, first thing ‘awm do.
When I get to heaven first thing I’ll do,
Pull out my horn and call old Blue,
I’ll say, “Here Old Blue come-on dog”
“Good dog you.”
I’ll say, “Here Blue-e”
“I’m a coming there too”
“Down boy, good dog”
I mean, really!
Moose the Mooche says
He’s a serial offender if you count that song about marrying his horse.
Neighhhh!
Sewer Robot says
My fear of the other extends to colours that sound a bit foreign..
DogFacedBoy says
Sacre Bleu!
Moose the Mooche says
Quelle mauve!
DogFacedBoy says
Plume de ma tante!
Moose the Mooche says
La sange est dans l’arbre!
Rigid Digit says
Mais le chat est sur la table.
GCU Grey Area says
‘Voici la famille Marsaud’.
La défectuosité obtiennent mon manteau.
Lando Cakes says
Ah, les Marsaud. Jean-Paul et Claudette?
GCU Grey Area says
et Marie-France.
Lando Cakes says
Dans le jardin, sans doute.
Sitheref2409 says
Singe, peut-etre?
Rigid Digit says
Fabrique de Belgique
mikethep says
scheiße braun
Moose the Mooche says
Gott in Himmel!
DogFacedBoy says
Aieeee!!!! For you ze var ist oveh, Englisher pigdog
Black Type says
Nein, es ist ‘rot in Himmel’!
Rigid Digit says
Luke Skyvalker ist Mark Himmel
DogFacedBoy says
Well it’s good nicht from me and good nicht from. Himmel
Moose the Mooche says
I’m hoping that “profession” will return, so that one can know who’s what and therefore how to treat people.
Gatz says
When did it disappear? I’ve always been puzzled when reference is made to a profession as ‘what it says in their passport’ because I’ve never had that option in mine.
Moose the Mooche says
There was also “complexion” so that we could sort out the real British people from the fuzzy-wuzzies.
GCU Grey Area says
My suspicious side says the new dunkelblau passport will have your NI number and all manner of other stuff in the biometric chip. How else will we be able to tell ‘us’ from ‘non-us’, and determine whether Johann-foreigner is entitled to our bounteous cornucopia or not?
Our current passport gives us visa-free travel to the other EU countries, and I rather suspect the new one won’t, when we ain’t in the EU. Oh how they’ll howl.
mikethep says
No they won’t, they’ll all be in Paignton.
GCU Grey Area says
I suppose Sid and Doris Bonkers will be happy in their Werthers Original-induced False Memory Syndrome of blue passports. Shame that there won’t be as many EU-passport holding doctors, nurses or carers looking after them.
Gatz says
Right. Now that’s sorted, who’s going to lead the campaign for the return of white dog shit?
GCU Grey Area says
Our dogs never did white ones. A friend’s poodle did. Was it diet, or breed?
Moose the Mooche says
Diet, I believe. There was all that bone-meal they used to eat.
Gatz says
I’ve never been a dog owner but I always assumed it was diet. Mind you, the campaign to get people to bin their dog crap has been one of the more successful attempts to change public behaviour in the past few decades so we unless you own a dog you may never know if the white stuff makes a return anyway. Unless Brexit means a return to pavements covered in shit too, which wouldn’t altogether surprise me.
Martin Hairnet says
Worry not, Gatz. Brexit and the global warming that accompanies it, will turn all UK dog shit white, in a chemical process analogous to coral bleaching. Failing that, Gove is working on the repatriation of a population of West Highland terriers from St Helena, who all share the white dog shit gene.
mikethep says
Hear the word of Farage: “A return to British passports means we are becoming a proper country again. We are getting our individuality and national identity back.”
If I remember rightly we were a proper country before he unleashed his dog-whistling bullshit all over us.
Moose the Mooche says
And some of us have never had blue passports because we couldn’t fucking afford foreign holidays.
dai says
My UK/EU passport runs out in 2026 but does it need to be replaced after Brexit because it says “European Union” on it? I am getting my (first) Canadian one in Jan and frankly will not be paying the considerable fee for a new blue non EU UK one if we are forced to change them before expiry.
metal mickey says
Brexit (like Trump in the US) has made it appear that we are somehow living in Bizarro-World… trivial things like the colour of passports is greeted as if a world-shaking event, whereas the important stuff (impact studies, lack thereof, lies told thereabout, and cabinet members having hordes of violent-but-legal porn on their computers) is just swept under the carpet, “nothing to see here”… truth is lies, freedom is slavery, you are getting a tex cut etc. etc…
As Martin Hairnet eloquently states above, this is subtly (and not-so-subtly) very destabilising stuff. It’s hard to tell if the right reaction is to riot in the streets, or just go and live in a croft on an island and forget about the world, which the tinfoil-hat-wearing part of my brain thinks is just what “they” want…
BigJimBob says
The is the First Step, mark my words. Next recolonization of India, Prince Harry can take on the Viceroy job (he’ll need some role to impress his fruity new wife-to-be). Then, when we have 1 billion people on board, we can retake USA. I am telling you, I wont buy a Globe until the joyful day when it is half covered in red again.
mikethep says
As long as his fruity new wife-to-be doesn’t start shagging the Indian PM, like the last Vicereine did.
Sitheref2409 says
All this way and no-one criticizing Roland Gift’s voice? Slackers.
(I think he’s great)
Vulpes Vulpes says
Passports? Pish. Time was, all an Englishman needed was a decent tailor, a good shave, and the world was one’s oyster. Johnny Foreigner started all that travel documentation malarkey to keep the bloody Turks in their place, I’ll have you know. Harrumph!
Moose the Mooche says
Well it hasn’t worked. Have you been in a chip shop lately? Harrumph!