Trump makes me very nearly physically sick. Separating those families, locking their kids in cages. The stupid, obnoxious way he looks and talks. His incoherence, his vile opinions, his brutal dismantling of everything that doesn’t have his name in gold on the front. And the following he encourages. When the Mueller team first got their feet under their desks I was following their every move. The sleazy characters they dragged in front of the camera with their cheap spiel seemed almost entertaining. People I never wanted to see or hear again were occupying the highest positions in American government, spouting lies, evading questions, stirring up the morons who’d follow Trump even if a tape of him screwing his daughter surfaced. Morons who think that Russia is on their side, more than the FBI. Insane times.
I don’t know exactly where the tipping point occurred for me. Certainly the ICE border lock-ups provided the first literally unwatchable footage from the Trump administration. And I got sick of Michael Avenatti, whose screen-hogging cliché-ridden rants quickly became as tiresome as his opponents’. Shep Smith at Fox News – of all places – provides an oasis of sharp and reasoned commentary. Rachel Maddow, Steven Colbert, and all the other rock-star commentators deliver the same message to the same audience night after night, without affecting a damn thing. For the Democrats, a withering Twitter response is seen as a political victory, yet I don’t hear even one of them stand up and make the truly devastating speech – from the fucking heart – that a Martin Luther King would be capable of. Bernie’s a nice guy, but he’s not a fighter, and that’s what the Dems need, not another Nice Person With Legitimate Concerns.
The long and short of it is that a kind of fatigue is creeping in. Trump is going to be there for a while yet, and he’s going to continue his insane policy of harm, destruction, and isolation even against the combined onslaught of another devastating Jim Carrey painting and a Colbert rim-shot “risqué” remark. Mueller is ultimately powerless to get rid of him – he can only present the evidence and hope that Congress does the right thing. I sometimes find myself thinking, fuck the USA anyway, and I know that’s wrong. That’s what Putin wants us to think.
There’s nothing I can do about any of this, except to limit the time I spend following the story, and getting upset by it. Maybe I’ll reach the happy state of most Thais, whose combined given fuck wouldn’t fill a paper cup. That’s an increasingly attractive option.