My son sent me this joke yesterday, &, as I say, it made me chuckle.
Man goes to the doctor & says “I think I am going deaf”
The doctor said “can you describe the symptoms”
Man replies, “certainly, Homer is fat & Marge has blue hair”…
This made me chuckle.
Bravo!
Quality!
I have an ailing colleague who expects me to feed him a continuous flow of new jokes to cheer him up. He’s a harsh critic so I’m appreciative of new, good jokes. Here are a few I found recently that made me laugh:
I once bought a dog from a blacksmith. As soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the back door.
Cop: “I’m arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia”
Man: “Wait! I can explain everything!”
People tell me that I take mini-golf way to seriously, but my caddy disagrees.
I needed a password for the ATO website that was 8 characters long. I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.
What do you call a woman who’s voice sounds like an ambulance? Nina.
Love the dog one. Been a while since I heard a new dog joke!
I changed my password to FOURTEENDAYS but apparently it was too weak
Don’t use “beef” either, its not Stroganoff
Beef?
How low can you go?
The first tiime I saw a universal remote control I thought, “this changes everything.”
👍
Check my privilege? I don’t think so. I have people to do that for me.
I was in a trampoline shop recently.
The one they had on display looked perfect for my young kids, so I went to buy it.
The shop owner looked doubtful and asked me to reconsider my decision.
“What if your children don’t bounce up and down?” he said, anxiously.
“What if…what if… they just float off…?” he was very distressed now.
I don’t think he understood the gravity of the situation.
Ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese. Make Britain Grate again
I read a book about the history of glue.
Couldn’t put it down
Arf!
I’m writing my autobiography on flypaper.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
I made up a joke once, ages ago. I like to repeat it on here every year or so.
Here it is
A tailor friend of mine has just been promoted.
He’s been making great strides recently.
That’s probably why you’re loved so much. The Dad Jokes are charming.
Aw, shucks