The Colossus of Bernie Rhodes
A giant effigy moulded from the huge stack of leftover 7”s which stand as a testament to The Clash’s days of chart chasing hubris.
The Great Pyramid Of Squeezer
A serendipitous commission for a genie resulted in our favourite artist owning an infinitely reusable teabag
The Minging Gardens Of Babyshambles
You’ve held your nose as these scruffy, smelly, chemically enhanced chancers took to the stage: now, imagine what their back yard must look like..
The Lighthouse People at Alexandria’s Chazza
Our bescarfed philanthropist invites you to flip past multiple copies of No Parlez and Be Here Now to her selection from the LIfted hitmakers
Juno Temple’s Arty Pics
The Ted Lasso star and heir to the Great Rock n Roll Swindle millions has displayed her tasteful photo shoot
The Statue Of Deus Ex Machina
A replica of the T Rex from the last scene of Jurassic Park: although it’s 40 feet tall and had to be hoisted into place with an enormous crane, they were able to move it into position without anyone hearing it coming.
The Mausoleum At Hayley Kiyoko’s
Turns out the lady loving pop Princess likes to have her dead relatives exceedingly close by
Okay, it’s just some sh*t puns – but this post was prompted by my surprise that when you search for “The Seven Wonders Of The World” you don’t get the Seven Wonders Of The Ancient World, because at some point the proper ones were replaced by New! Improved! ones, like the way the way, one day, Frank Lampard Junior became Frank Lampard and his dad became “Who?”.
But, comrades, if there were Wonders Of The Afterworld, what would they be?
Number One would probably be Ghost Town
Parallel Lines by Blondie
Great Pyramid of Geezer Butler
Queen Victoria’s secret Isle of Wight hideaway, Ozzy Osbourne House.
From Marillion’s heavy rock phase, the live album Elgin Marbles In The Park.
Two of the ‘modern’ seven wonders fit here anyway.
Colosseum and Taj Mahal.
I Just Called To Say I Love You?
Although, this would do me fine
Big respect for the finely-crated punnetry in the OP, by the way.
There is still only one Stevie Wonder.
Here’s a vaguely-linked-to-the-OP quiz. Put that google machine DOWN!
1. The Native Daughters of the Golden West
Is it:
A. A group of 3 metre high stone obelisks arranged in a small circle in Monument Valley, Arizona?,
OR
B. An OMD album track
2. The Whispering Boys
Is it
A. Evenly-spaced cherubic motifs chiselled into the plinth area of the Sphynx
OR
B. A Residents album track
3. Attic War
Is it
A. Conflict between Penthesilia and Thesus/Heracles, according to Greek mythology
OR
B. A Half Man Half Biscuit album track
No takers, BC! Maybe it’s cos any of them sound like they could be Dusty Bin
Sorry to kill your thread @sewer-robot !
In the hope that the Massive can forgive me and move on, the answers are as follows:
1. It’s an OMD album track
2. It’s a Residents album track
3. It’s NOT a HMHB album track
No worries @black-celebration – twas a Norwegian Blue before you came along. I did know number 1 in your quiz, but was 50/50 on the others..
Lovely plumage
The Colossus of Nick Rhodes.
The Hanging Gardens of Babylong John Baldry
The Temple of Artemisty in Roots
The Statue of Zeus at (Joe Mr) Olympiano Henderson
The Great Pyramid of Geezer Butler
From 1970 onwards, Geezer’s tour rider featured 12 cans of locally-sourced strong lager, with a further 12 shipped to his large home in Warwickshire. He figured that his tour memoirs would be very lucrative in the future….but rather than note down the events in real time, he decided to go with the flow (i.e. get pissed on the lager) and jog his memory later in the comfort of his home by having another, similar, lager drinking session in his own time.
In the downtime between tours, Geezer would relive his on-road antics by opening up the lager package that had been sent and reenacting the events of that day, using mannequins to represent Ozzy, Tony Iommi and the rest of the Sabs, There were even mannequin roadies and a groupie or two!
He’d play his bass to the exact set list and then take the imaginary applause. He’d then wrap a towel round his neck, and wander around “backstage” (his garden), chatting to the mannequins and drinking the rest of the lager until he passed out.
The next morning, with a thumping headache he would ruefully line up the empty cans against a very large wall that was at one end of his tennis court, figuring that one day he WILL write his memoirs and the line of cans will doubtless jog his memory and THEN the words will surely flow.
Geezer has being doing this for over 50 years and the pile of lager cans is now so high that a new wall had to be built to accommodate them. In later years his lager consumption per tour reduced which means the line of lager cans reduced, which gives us its distinctive pyramid shape.
It can now be seen from a local railway line and locals know that once the great pyramid of Geezer Butler disappears, they can run off to the local bookshop and his published tour journals will be there, on the shelves.
The pyramid is still there.
Explains why the nanny always went to Tumbletots with his kids. One of two Black Sabbath kids my daughter came into contact with, the other being Tony Iommi’s daughter, who went to the same 6th form College as her.
Marvellous story. I’ll retell it next time I go to a dinner party.
It also has the advantage of being completely true…
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