In the ‘sixties (a bore writes), it was the format of the U.K. beat combo; three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
Here’s one example: Yer Beatles. Paul was the Pretty One. Yes, the others had their Special Fans, but Paulie was The Pretty One.
Other examples?
It is my contention that Punk Rock put an end to this. The Pretty Pistol? The Pretty Pogue? But are there any exceptions? Why am I asking you?
‘Pretty’ was a relative term, which is why every band had to have a Ringo – the control, the benchmark against which the prettiness of the others could be contrasted. If your pretty one wasn’t especially pretty, you needed a lot of Ringos. I give you Gerry and The Pacemakers.
They could have been posties, but they chose pop!
Peter Noone in Herman’s Hermits.
Freddy Garretty in Freddie and the Dreamers. Er, wait a minute……
The Zombies didn’t have one, which explains their relative lack of success. Rod Argent wasn’t bad-looking, but his hair always makes him look like an old-school Lego figure. Colin B sounded (and sounds) like an angel but the resemblance stops there. The others… more Uni Challengers.
It’s a bit hard to tell with any certainty exactly what it is you’re on about, but… I’d say Larry Mullen Jr was the only looker in post punk pop combo U2. As Boy George told Bono: “If you still haven’t found what you’re looking for, look behind the drum kit.”
I admit the concept is hard to grasp – one of the more abstract of Afterword posts! Let me try to put it another way – in the ‘sixties, the format of the U.K. beat combo was three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
Can you think of an example, Gar?
Indeed I can! Go me!
I must say I like the cut of your jib, young man! Like the way you’re shaping up!
Paul Simonon.
Either the exception that proves the rule, or the rule, depending on your definition of punk.
My definition of punk includes Blondie. I may be going out on a limb here, but I think I’ve spotted a pretty one..
Yeah, Jimmy Destri.
Cheekbones like wing-mirrors.
I knew a bloke who was a JD dead ringer and a total pr*ck, so a bit of a blind spot for me, I’m afraid.
Yep, Jimmy was relegated to the back cover of Eat To The Beat, while Frank ‘Enstein’ Infante got the Ringo role on the front, to make Debbie and Chris look even more gorgeous
Syd.
Dave Gilmour had a lot going for him in the early 70s I would have said. As seen in Pompeii. There was the debacle of the 80s hair and clothing (Deram warning) but now he’s fixed that and remains rather well preserved.
OK – when they were a ‘60s beat combo, the answer was Syd. Better?
Well Dave took Syd’s place which also meant taking over the role of pretty boy so both right.
DG actually worked as a model prior to the Floyd.
Spoiler alert: Roger Waters didn’t.
Despite his very poor start in the looks department, there was a period when I thought Rog had aged surprisingly well, better than David or Syd. With his thick white hair and toned physique he looked a bit like Richard Gere. Now though he always looks like a swivel-eyed loon to me. More Anne Widdecombe than Richard Gere.
He were t’ Milky Bar Kid in them T.V. adver-tise-ments though but.
Greg Lake in 1969. Later, “not so much”.
Chris Squire, for both cases, likewise.
By the time of Father Christmas, Greg Lake looked like a prog-rock hamster.
You should have seen him in 1992 when he was in a highly inadvised leather outfit for the ELP reunion shows at the RAH. The gig was spectacular. In EVERY respect.
Uncertain if you got a lot of Lake for the pounds, or whether there were a lot of pounds to the Lake.
That’s exactly what a massive bassist would say.
@jeff
Arf! I like that. Deserves recognition!
Ha ha, thanks @freddy-steady, cheque on its way.
It was indeed most droll.
Jon Anderson was always a bit of a looker I think. Have I revealed too much?
Richey Edwards had that role in the Manics – although (controversially?) I believe Richey’s role in the Manics has been inflated since his disappearance
His main role was to say things in interviews while James made the records.
Claws in, Moosey!
It’s true that he couldn’t play guitar, and therefore he didn’t play on the records, and had his volume turned down to almost nothing while on stage.
His role was to write lyrics (normally a 70/30 split with Nicky Wire) and lead the artistic direction of the band, while looking sexy and saying controversial things, while James and Sean made the music.
With the early Manics the iconography was more arguably more important than the music, so I’m not sure his role was ‘inflated’ as such.
If anything the opposite as it was made clear that musically he added a flat zero to the band, before his disappearance he pretended to play guitar. And the best Manics album has mainly lyrics by him (The Holy Bible), and he also wrote the lyrics for some of the songs on their second best (Everything Must Go), plus all the lyrics for arguably their best album this century (Journal for Plague Lovers)
Richie Edwards contributed the lyric “I laughed when Lennon got shot” to the song Motown Junk. This lyric has now been dropped from the song when The Manics perform it live. I wonder why?
Because they’ve grown up presumably.
Pretty Things = Phil May
Pink Floyd = Syd Barrett > David Gilmour
Monkees = Davy Jones
Rolling Stones = Mick + Brian
Beatles = Paul + George
Could it be that having TWO pretty ones in the band was a factor in the success of the HJHMs and the (ICGN)SHMs?
The Grumpy One? Pretty?
Are you legally blind?? By far the most beautiful Beatle, even the long hippie hair and 70s porn tache couldn’t disguise how utterly gorgeous he was.
Yebbut BEAUTIFUL ain’t PRETTY.
(Cuh. Kids today? No attention span.)
Yebbut BEAUTIFUL ain’t “snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed” either.
Yebbut nobut NOBODY SAID IT WAS *growls threateningly*
Except for some bloke in the OP:
In the ‘sixties (a bore writes), it was the format of the U.K. beat combo; three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
Here’s one example: Yer Beatles. Paul was the Pretty One. Yes, the others had their Special Fans, but Paulie was The Pretty One.
*clears bric-a-brac from coffee table with brawny forearm, leans in*
Are you legally blind? “The Pretty One” is THE TITLE of this piece. Not “The Beautiful One”.
(Oh, and “mansplaining* is a portmanteau word combining “man” and “explaining”, and means a man patiently explaining something to a woman because she needs a little help understanding something.)
Don’t get your knickers in a twist, love.
Your pretty is my beautiful, and your beautiful is apparently snaggle-toothed, whey-faced and potato-nosed – got it!
Thanks ever so much for the crystal clear mansplanation! 😀
*silent for a few seconds, staring down at hands spread on coffee table* I think … we’re done here. “stands, walks stiffly away*
Rolling Stones also Mick + the other Mick
The Who – Roger and/or Keith
Keith? Keith? Keith Moon? KEITH FUCKING MOON?!?!?
Roger is a worse suggestion. He looks exactly how Pete describes him – “a Shepherds Bush geezer”
Ah, but a muscular streetwise Shepherds Bush geezer who you’d think twice about messing with. Classic bit of working class rough. Appeals to many women and some men too, particularly Kit Lambert.
He is nine inches tall and has aged into your lesbian auntie. Come now.
I don’t think I will.
Maybe not by 1978 bloating point, but mid-60s little boy lost look
Rog – call him the pretty boy and he’d duff you up.
On your point that punk finished it off surely it was essential to have at least one pretty one in the 80s?
The 60s not being my strong point I’ll stay safe and ask was Jagger considered pretty?
Mark O’Toole, if we’re talking 80s.
Jagger seemed to have defined a persistent one in rock music. The androgynous male that was simultaneously pretty and ugly.
The Grateful Dead. Heartthrob? Mr Bob Weir.
Good call.
Still a looker.
Yeah – the beard suits him!
I model my patriarchal sage-like looks after his (some way after his, it has to be said).
I thought it had been decided George was the best looking one. Paul was more like the polite one his date’s mother would approve of. Theory may be a bit shaky.
Please refer to the O.P. – the term is Pretty One. Not Best-Looking One, nor yet Polite One (great subjects for a follow-up thread!).
Nah. Paul was consistently the pretty one there.
Had Stuart Sutcliffe survived though…
Or Pete Best not been sacked.
I know a lady of a certain age who used to go to the Cavern Club to see, in her words, Pete Best and the Beatles. She wasn’t the only one.
I have to say in the Lewisohn book he comes across as quite the knob, and the whole business of him being in the band was unsustainable when they were in Liverpoool. His mother referred to the Beatles as “Pete’s Band”, as if he was Cliff and they were the Shads. Ironically one of the reasons they found could sack him was because he hadn’t bonded with the others, spending his offstage time, er, “taking advantage of his popularity”.
Times have changed, Moosey. We’ve moved on.
When Britpop stole (or, depending on your view, lovingly tried to recreate) the 60s beat pop phenomenon they certainly took on this rule too.
Oasis – Liam, the good looking singer (backed by Brezhnev & 3 brickies)
Blur – Slight exception as 2 for 1 on the singer & bassist
Charlatans – he looks like a deranged caricature of Warhol these days, but back in the 90s Tim Burgess was definitely the pretty one.
Menswear – Definitely attracted the lovestruck teenager in the 90s. Sure as hell wasn’t the tunes was it?!
Bluetones – Mark Morriss was a bit of a looker it has to be said
Elastica – Would not be able to name another member other than Justine
Less said about Black Grape the better
90s-wise, Ride’s Mark Gardiner. Much-imitated hair then – now a not-much imitated,er, hat.
I imitated Mark Gardner’s hair in the 90s and am now also a, er, hat-wearer.
As Max Bialystock observed, “If you’ve got it, flaunt it!”
I would go with Donna from Elastica (didn’t though)
That may be true, but is this really the place to tell us that….?
I once got into a barber’s chair that Damon Albarn had just got out of and remember thinking I use the same barber, pay the same price, but how come you never make me look as good as him?
When I got tired of my Mark Gardener floppy fringe, I went to the barber with a picture of Damon Albarn. They never made me look as good as him either.
Going to the barber’s with a page from the NME must be “a thing”. When I had my waist-length tresses shorn it was a picture of the Low album cover that my barber ignored.
I took a copy of Wings Wildlife to my barbers when I was 14 and told him I wanted to look like Paul. He couldn’t cut my hair for laughing.
I once took a picture of George Clooney to my barber. Now I can’t walk out and about without gorgeous ladies asking me for a coffee. True story.
What about Eric Stewart of 10 cc? The others were an unfortunate, odd mix of features but he was almost feminine as was the tendency then. Also my sister thought he was dishy.
Godley & Creme were perfect for that Cry video because they both already had faces that looked like photofit images.
I always thought Lol Creme was the pretty one.
Manfred Mann: Paul Jones or Mike d’Abo with a University Challenge team.
Well D’Abo was chosen as much for his convenient similarity to PJ, so….
Roger Taylor of Queen. So pretty he made a convincing, attractive young lady in that video.
I suspect that we have a winner…
That’s not a winner….
Simon Cowe.
That’s a winner.
In support of the Saucecraft thesis, I tender “The Easybeats” with requisite heart throb little Stevie Wright.
From 9 o’clock, you’ve got Wilko Johnson’s pan-faced younger brother, Boris Johnson, a shit waxwork of Dudley Moore, a cartoon of Keith Moon “but make his face look even more like a bag of dicks”, and Rory Stewart dressed for croquet. Was the “pretty one” taking the pic?
That’s something Deramdaze never mentions. They were all ugly in them days.
I larfed more at hedgepig’s comment than at anything else on the internet today. Mind you, I’ve only just got up.
If I see someone attractive in 2022 I pop it in my diary.
“Eggs, Beans, Cereal, Pop music (no, no record shops), Trophy for Tottenham (erm… no) – oh yeah, saw someone attractive today.”
That’s why, to keep my spirits up, I always make sure to have a shave in the morning.
@moose-the-mooche : deramdaze “pops it in his diary”.
Keeps his spirits up, ‘pparently.
Since you’ve mentioned Wilko, who was the pretty one in Dr Feelgood, eh?
I’d imagine Lee Brilleaux could have brushed up well. If he’d owned a brush.
Brush? He’d have needed a Brillo.
Hang on ..
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=8rTc3l2nwJ4&feature=share
[I’ve forgotten how to do the linky thing]
I’m not sure if I’ve got the hang of this. But here goes.
I give you The Residents.
I don’t think you’ve got the hang of this at all, Hubes (verification requested). My interpretation of the OP is that we are being asked for examples of pop groups with three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at. Like, say, Jedward for example, except with three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
I think they’re ALL lookers.
*grudging wish-I’d-thought-of-that applause for Mr. Celebration*
Hats off!
On a recent Word in Your Ear podcast, Dave and Mark go on at length about how attractive (I think “gorgeous” was the term used) the Small Faces were. I was stunned. They are all weird looking, with that big Thunderbird/ventriloquist dummy head and jug ears that lots of those born-in-the-war UK band members had. But then again, I befriended a guy on my first day of uni purely because I thought he was ugly and would have trouble making friends. Queue five years of Bill the Sex God (as he was dubbed by the ladies) literally having women throw themselves at him in public places. The bastard.
https://www.udiscovermusic.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Small-Faces-GettyImages-80148224.jpg
Edit: I give up trying to post photos on this place
I disagree. Steve Marriott at this stage was completely scrumptious. Although probably more of a snack than a meal it has to be said.
There y’go
Gail Tilsley there second from left looking uncharacteristically cheerful.
That’s a hell of a long queue for Bill The Sex God
He was a dirty sod … a dirty old man, a dirty fucker and a fucking rotter.
Professor Griff. Pretty boy, ugly ideas.
The winsome Banton, rocking the Nesmith look:
Mmm. I think the young Peter Hammill was always going to win the Davy Jones Memorial Cup here…
Each to their own…
Don’t fancy yours much.
Sex symbols in English prog rock… not sure Panini would get a sticker album outta that.
“Not sure Panini would get a sticker album outta that.”
Genius. Even if you stole it, it’s still genius.
Don’t think too many read the OP. Plenty of posts here about bands that pre-date punk.
As for that era Paul Weller is pretty good looking isn’t he?
He was better-looking in TSC than in The Jam.
No more Long Hot Summer video for you! The exams are in a month and you’ll need that wrist for writing..
It’s enough to give you (wild) wood.
I was going to disagree and say that prime proto-mullet, stripey blazer and bowling shoes Foxton was the one. Can definitely rule Buckler out.
Which reminds me…
Double denim buckler! Cardigan Weller! Foxton wisely lurking at the back.
“New Balls Please.”
I’m not surprised Wimbledon always needs new balls – this lot, including the two that might be female, all seem to have a substantial package, Derek Smalls-esque, in the relegation area.
Weller’s looks like a Beach Ball!
Can’t be Kosher, so to speak.
“…the two that might be female”.
*puts kindly arm around Deram’s shoulder*…
Is there somewhere where we might speak privately, Deram?
Just say no, deramdaze.
Not reading the OP correctly is part of the fun of this place.
Burt didn’t use the box either. It’s the last day of term and we’re all being cheeky scamps.
@dai
But H.P. also asked
“Here’s one example: Yer Beatles. Paul was the Pretty One. Yes, the others had their Special Fans, but Paulie was The Pretty One.
Other examples?”
Which I would take to read that he wanted other examples of sixties bands to confirm his postulation.
Dai, I don’t think you read the OP, did you? Here it is again for those of you sailing close to the wind:
In the ‘sixties (a bore writes), it was the format of the U.K. beat combo; three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
Here’s one example: Yer Beatles. Paul was the Pretty One. Yes, the others had their Special Fans, but Paulie was The Pretty One.
Other examples? (🔙)
A red-blooded and strictly for the laydeez mate observed, on sight of a clip on YouTube showing Robert Plant in 1969 in the bloom of youth “you would, wouldn’t you?”. Reader, I kept my council.
Speaking of pouched-out succulence, why has nobody brought up hair metal and the earlier joys of ANGEL’s lead singer, that can drive a helpless young drummers wild with desire? “Oh Punky!”
How the actual flip do I post an image link here?
Have you lot changed your fax number or summink?
Use Imgur, or the box, or get a Fiio… Something like that
I’ve got Windows 85 and some old Nokia phone chargers in the kitchen drawer – will that work? Same sorta thing, right?
@Jeff If you arrange a time and set your coordinates and go outside and hold your photo up, I’m sure those of us with binoculars will be able to see it.
Finally! A solution!
My dear @hubert-rawlinson, thankyou *so* much.
Ok, so …my coordinates… well…[coyly] 6-foot(ish); biped; eyes two (2no.), blue, arranged traditionally either side of the nose; teeth, light brown, some intact; hair, good solid 100% coverage, Silver Fox…
… and I’m outside now, holding my photo up, facing towards…uh… the left? No, up a bit. See me? Yoo-hoo! [waves]
@Jeff Sorry I’d gone to bed then and only just seen your post. Could you try again please? Wave a flaming torch or a soddin’ lantern that may help.
@hubert-rawlinson I’m stood on a stack of perishing tyres – any good?
Blinkin’ ‘eck!
Sorry @Jeff I’ve only just got back in and missed your post.
Same time tomorrow?
Oh yes absolutely @hubert-rawlinson, you try an’ stop me!!
I’m sure we’ll get this sorted, any day now.
The pretty Pistol? Sid. He wasn’t there to play bass.
The pretty Pogue? Cait, obvs.
And Tina Weymouth in the Talking Heads
Oh Dai. No The.
The name of that band was Talking Heads, even when Syd Barrett was with them.
I knew that, not sure what happened there.
Shush, we’re the only two people here who know Syd Barrett was in Talking Heads. Hence:
– Uh-Oh, Arnold Layne Comes to Town
– Don’t Worry About the Effervescing Elephant
– Burning Down the Roundhouse
– More Songs about Buildings & Gnomes
Arf! Four points to the Moose…and what do points mean?
The ability for a train to change track?
Arf squared!
Was she there for girls to scream at or possibly for David Byrne to scream at? Allegedly.
David was just screaming generally, Tina’s presence wasn’t necessary.
I note that nobody has so far refuted my double-headed riposte to the OP. I think I’ll take that to the bank, before anyone devalues the currency.
You are evidently unwell, Sal. That’s why we’re holding back.
Touch me, I’m sick, H.P.
*shuffles awkwardly* Well … okay then. Just the once, mind!
Boff in Chumbawamba.
Struggling to find a pretty Oyster, Leveller or any much anyone with a folkier vibe. I suppose Simon has some barely legal charm in the early Fairport.
Maybe it was the girls in the Chumbas and Fairport?
Come now! It was dishy Richard Thompson who got the gal’s hearts a-flutterin’ back in the early days of Fairport!
Hearts? Do I mean eyelashes?
@H-P-Saucecraft a doctor writes,
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/heart-palpitations/
Not just the “gal’s hearts a-flutterin’ ” a gay friend of mine on looking at the cover of Morris On declared that Tommo was dishy.
I think Martin Lamble was probably the prettiest Fairport.
Judy’s prescription cross-channel swimming goggles perhaps an unwise choice for the photo-shoot.
Actually, in their original lineup there were arguably 3 pretty Fairports.
Ian MacDonald (later Matthews) was a looker.
.
RT looks to be the potato-faced one in this clip. Big noses and whey-faces also present.
Peter Frampton in his Herd days.
I’m just wondering whether Jimi Hendrix was pretty? Not something I was expecting to do today…
I think we can say without fear of contradiction that he was the prettiest in the JHE.
Power trios are problematic. It’s like they were groups that wouldn’t hire a Pretty One. Cream? ZZ Top?
Every single day of my life I consider if Jimi Hendrix is pretty and every single day of my life I come to the conclusion he is.
I’ll start again on this process tomorrow.
Oh, it’s today…
Question: Is he?
Answer: Yes.
Speaking of Cream, have you ever seen LateStageClaptonIsGod in the same room as Christine Lagarde, eh eh eh, hmm?
https://images.app.goo.gl/khPVBg4C2fii9CQb7
No? Well, there you are then, point proven.
Pete Briquette of the Boomtown Rats who married the rather gorgeous Jane Aire
Reader, she married him…. what?
Surprised no-one’s mentioned this lot – obvious pretty one far right.
Is that INXS?
That’s not a band, silly, it’s extras from Witchfinder General
I actually knew this. It’s the awesome HP Lovecraft, with mouthwatering Michael Tegza (drummer) at right. I have bored at length on this band “on my blog”.
I was listening tert’ White Ship only a couple of days back.
Great bell work.
If you can find it (*hint*) the third album Valley Of The Moon is unexpectedly brilliant.
“Valley Of The Moon” by Norton Buffalo??
That is a fine album (and another I’ve featured “on my blog”) but I’m referring to the album of the same name by “Lovecraft”, which was in some ways, not least numerically, the third album by H.P. Lovecraft, and it’s excellent, if not as wonderfully deranged as the second. But nothing is.
Tina Weymouth and Gaye Advert both featured on my hall of residence wall. Siouxie too but for the swastikas.
That reminds me – TV Smith’ s coming to Hull in September. As if we haven’t got enough problems etc
He examines the whole issue of “problems” (and diet) in some depth in his verse, postulating that:
We wear our problems, we wear our fate
But we have to eat what we put on the plate
But then he continues:
Some people wallow in hate, some wallow in fear
Neither two are recommended around here
Which annoys me a bit, because it should be “neither one is”. Makes me question the rigour with which his entire thesis was developed.
@gary
Bit surprised at the lack of responses to your post. These things are important.
Everything Gar says is important. I’m having his comments transcribed into a vellum breviary for my declining years.
The Mothers Of Invention = Ian Underwood
Country Joe & The Fish = Country Joe
Why did they have an 18th century sessions judge in the band?
Country Joe (going Val Kilmer on our asses) is tough sell.
He’s got his hair on back to front, for starters.
The more you look at the hair in this pic the less sense the universe makes.
No wonder him on the right’s wearing his mam’s tea cosy.
She’ll be furious. “I’ll one-two-three you, you little sod!”
Eno was known to wear his mum Maria’s tea cosy on occasion, when going to the Red Lion for the Thursday night folk sessions in Woodbridge, Moosie.
Hardly surprising – that chrome-dome can be seen from the moon… also, he’s weird.
I don’t knowwwwwwww…
[winks and mugs ridiculously at The Massive]…
…why DID they have an 18th century sessions judge in the band????!!!!
[House band: trombone parping, cymbals clashing]
[FX: crickets chirping]
I’m struggling to think who the looker was in Gillan era Deep Purple. Of course Coverdale joined when he left, but before then … ?
Whilst The Beach Boys never quite oozed raw sex (Mike Love?) Dennis in his prime was a bit of a handsome feller.
Dennis was personally responsible for every Beach Boys record bought by a girl.
Dennis was responsible for 90% of Beach Boys sales? Just goes to show. Brian’s studio wizardry was less popular than I thought.
Studio wizardry doesn’t moisten many girls’ gussets, Tig. Ask Fentonsteve.
It’s mainly the cape and the pointed hat that puts them off.
Not the sleeve?
I am disgust.
Although, in the live arena, if I had a pound for every time an attractive lady had asked me “Cor, do you really know what all those knobs do?” I’d be up to at least a tenner by now.
Perhaps I should have worked a bit longer on my reply of “yes, especially this very small one down here”.
“Cor, do you really know what all those knobs do?”
“Yes, that one’s the bassist, that one’s the singer….oh be like that then!”
Which one?
Noel Gallagher in the middle there
Derren Nesbit, far right.
Too many eyebrows.
I think you’ll find it’s Andy Burnham.
Obviously the gals’ favourite is Brains. The lads are sunk by their silly-hat-and-sash combo, while Brains is Mr “bow ties are cool”.
“Do you ever take off those glasses?”, asks the lady as her strings loosen
“Uh..uh.. only when I’m ..uh.. making love”, replies Mr Hackenbacker
*Cut to human female hand holding a pair of spectacles as Barrry Gray’s sex theme starts to play..*
(Although, it should be noted, there’s a sizeable rump of bad boy besotted babes who are just dying to find out what’s under The Hood)
Whoa whoa whoa whoaaaa!
Mr HACKENBACKER????
And the family name is TRAAAACEEEEEY????!!!!
Are you saying that Brains was, uh, ‘born on the wrong side of the blanket’?????
Does Mrs Tracey know about this???
While the lads who pilot the machines are all the seed of ..er.. Jeff, Jeff and therefore all Tracys, Brains is the ..er.. brains of the operation and only came on board following an exhaustive tendering process.
1 Must be brainy
2 Must be puppet
That’ll be the post-Brexit light-touch common-sense procurement process we all voted for.
His generous cash donations to International Rescue got him to the top of the shortlist.
He was the only one on the short list, due to challenges in the height department.
@H-P-Saucecraft I was at the documentary about Gerry Anderson recently presented by Gerry Anderson’s son.
At the Q and A someone mentioned puppets an admonishing voice from the back shouted “marionettes”. It appears they were never classed as puppets as marionettes utilise strings whereas puppets are hand held.
When asking my question I offered the portmanteau word freshly coined that day of puppionettes. It was gratefully received.
Were you there in cosplay?
No wiv mi son.
No Larping involved.
Ah, good, sounds like you’re exactly the person to whom I can address my remaining Tracy Family questions, @hubert-rawlinson , namely:
– in the photo above, what the fck is John *on* there? Look at his eyes! Yes, I accept that he’s got to have a little bit of ‘help’ to get through those 6-month shifts on Thunderbird 5, but he’s absolutely off his face there. Even if it’s a prescription medication, I think there surely needs to be some checks & balances on how much he’s actually dosing, doesn’t there? Has he even read the leaflet warning about not operating heavy machinery? I’m no doctor but I’d certainly class a ‘space-based global monitoring station’ as heavy machinery. Who’s in charge of Risk Assessment & Mitigation?
– second from left, that’s TV’s very likeable George Clarke, the architect, isn’t it? How did he get involved?
– if they’re all brothers…why do no two of them look alike?
– …and why do *none* of them resemble their dad, Jeff “Mr” Tracy!!!????
Just what the hell is going on on that island????
@Jeff should I see it again I shall ask your questions. It appears a comic brought out which addresses my question. Maybe you’ll be lucky with yours.
Alan Hansen not pictured.
Marina, obvs
Mind you, let’s be honest, Stingray is gorgeous.
Well if an end hadn’t been put to it already then it certainly was when The Motors came along.
Bram Tchaikovsky – looker
Pub Rock though – not blessed.
Bram Tchaikovsky – he liked to look
I doubt that you’ll find many fans of Generation X here, or anywhere…but Billy Idol was a VERY pretty boy (even with that silly Elvis sneer).
Good point. Well made.
https://images.app.goo.gl/NAERZELhZdL8pePs5
Fits the brief perfectly.
Edit: oh FFS could somebody please sort this out for me. This is an absolute threadwinner.
That photograph is cruel – although La Hoffs is THE most gorgeous thing in the entire history of everything, there were a couple of other lookers in the group who would have been the pretty one in any other line-up.
This is, at best, 50% incorrect.
You do the arith.
Do the arith yerself – if 50% incorrect is “best possible”, anything less would be worse, e.g. 40% incorrect would be worse than 50%, and 60% incorrect would be better.
What was the number you first thought of?
*gestures*
Well, really!
*gestures back, quite forcefully, using both hands*
*displays naked buttocks*
*blenches…
…but recovers quickly to inflate neck sac*
“And that, children, is what happens when you swallow bubble-gum. So think on”
There y’go @Jeff
Ah, thanks @hubert-rawlinson .
I must get myself some Use The Box! training.
Shed Seven in drag.
I think you’re very cruel. *chokes back sob with hankie*
Which one is Matthew Sweet?
SECURITY!!!!!
Well, my theory is that Glam Rock “changed the game” in the early 70s by showing that you could have chart success without the need for any pretty boys. Bands like Slade, Alice Cooper and The Sweet were “Disruptive Innovators” who “created a paradigm shift”, leading to a period of 10-15 years where for British pop stars it was more important to have some glamour rather than looks (Elton John, Freddie Mercury, Johnny Rotten, Boy George, Rod Stewart, Simon Le Bon etc). This continued until the emergence of the boy bands in the late 80s.
I’ll be discussing this, and my book “Glamovation: How Noddy Holder transformed the British Music Industry” in the August edition of the Harvard Business Review Idea cast, if I can get my Zoom to work
“Disruptive Innovators”? I’ll be keen to hear more about that.
But I’m not sure about that list of yours. Elton certainly needed all the feather boas he could muster. But Rod, Simon and Freddie were not ugs.
That makes me think of Rod, Jane and Freddy, not to mention Zippy, George and Bungle.
In Rainbow, George was certainly the pretty one.
Ronnie James Dio?
Cozy Powell was a looker.
Brian Connolly and Jim Lea had certainly never been smacked with the Ugly Stick.
Noddy was pretty rough too of course, and I once read Dave Hill described as looking ‘like your mum after a ten hour gin bender’.
Where are we on Duran Duran? Don’t tell me Simon Le Bon. He was a right ugly fucker.
John Taylor – naturally gawjus
Nick Rhodes – unnaturally gawjus
Roger Taylor – no ‘Roger Taylor out of Queen:, fo’ sho’
Andy Taylor – Nah
Other DD members:
Rhodes Boyson – no
Shaw Taylor – no
Taylor Swift – yes
Graham Coxon?
We’ve done Blur – it was Damon and the Cheese Knob (as he’s called in our house).
Obviously not Dave Rowntree – a ginger drummer, I asks yer …
Yeabbut he’s a Durannie now, inne?
Is he? The ‘Ran are still going? Lawd elp us. Between that and yer man out of the Spands joining Pink Floyd the whole of music history is happening at once.
Coming next: Dappy joins the Crickets
Nick Rhodes now looks like Klaus Kinski as directed by Herzog.
I was at a wedding in the Cotswolds recently (yes, I know) and the Cheese Knob himself was there, looking 9 months pregnant
That’ll be all that…. chocolate
His cheese is good though. He did a corporate I worked on and quite a lot of it “fell” into the cable trunk.
Endorsed by the Truss woman?
Please stop saying cheese, please. I had biliary colic a couple of weeks ago, my gall bladder thus announcing to me it was full of stones. Forswearing off cheese, bacon, crips, fried stuff until they chop it out. Which is unlikely, with the NHS as it currently is, to be any time soon. Mind you, could have been worse; I thought it may have been pancreatitis at the time……
I seem to recall Ian McCullough describing
Le Bon as ‘no oil painting, unless Jackson Pollock painted in oils.’ It’s a great quote ruined only by the fact that, yes, he did paint in oils early in his career, only to replace them with synthetic resin-based paints (what do you mean: copied from wiki?? How dare you, you swine).
Always thought Le Bon looked like former pie-heavy Liverpool midfielder Jan Molby.
Can.
Look no further than Michael Karoli for the top Krautrock heartthrob.
Karl Bartos was the pretty one in Kraftwerk.
Fray Bentos was the meaty one in Uruguay.
Was he not the President of Cuba?
Or maybe the lead singer in the Gibson Brothers
Ah yes, of course, you are entirely correct, thank-you.
Every day’s a learning day for me on here.
Pretty one in the Ramones? Must be Paul.
Take a wild guess:
…..well it ain’t Allan Clarke, is it? He looks like their Legal Aid solicitor there.
Bobby Elliot: “Can we stand under a tree for the pic?”
Others: “Why?”
Bobby: “You fkin know why, hairy bastards!”
He had “hairline issues”. There’s always one.
We were always working to hairline tolerances…
I can’t tell the bottom from the (shiny) top
Although the other two are none too shabby, Morten Harket is the very definition of ‘the pretty one’.
Frankly I am disappoint. I thought Gary would be all over this like a rash …
Talking of Gary…what do we think?
You can’t see his wonderful teeth!
If ever there was a “girls’ group”, it was The Walker Brothers.
Has anyone mentioned The Doors yet? Jim Morrison was none too shabby. Not at first, anyway. While the other three were more snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks.
No mention of Roxy yet?
I remember being about 6 and watching them perform what I now know to be Street Life and being completely bowled over. Bryan was so incredibly stylish and I wanted to be like him. Even if they were all in full gorilla suits on space hoppers, you’d be able to tell which one was Bryan Ferry. It would be the elegant one with impeccable fur.
I think Eno was a bigger hit with the ladies. Pretty in an otherwordly sense. Possibly a factor in the shyer Bryan wanting shot of him. Too much competition?
Indeed I had a friend that went with his girlfriend to see Roxy when Eno was with them. He came home alone.
You know someone whose girlfriend had it off with Eno? Respect.
I guess at some point he said “Here come the …”.
No. Leave it.
Also someone who spent some time with Dave Davies.
Is it Dave Davies?
I was trying to find a way of saying it without saying it. Performed the beast with two backs.
I imagine they were together all day and all of the night.
Different times, duco. We’ve moved on.
The fleshly lusts of the siblings Eno? Paging @nigelthebald….
I came as soon as I cou…
Maybe I should rephrase that, @retropath2…
Tough call for the Kinks, but I reckon Dave’s Byronic barnet gives him the edge over Pete. Which one’s Pete? Does it matter?
(Note how Ray’s been told to dip his chin to reduce prognaceousness. Clever lensing.)
I think we know the answer to this one…Not, as you might think, an office outing, but Brummie TMWH The Applejacks.
I would guess bottom right – Hamburg Harrison looks and a petulant streak because being the youngest he’s been forced to sit on a chair intended for infants.
I confess my thought was bottom left, but perhaps I’m taking this folderol way too seriously
And yet who did Megan Davies (for it is she in the middle) up and marry? The fellow at top left…the drummer!
Once he showed her his paradiddle, she was putty in his hands.
I reckon the one in the centre.
(I wonder what song they could be referencing)
I don’t reckon those guitars are even plugged in.
A U.K. beat combo with three snaggle-toothed, whey-faced, potato-nosed blerks, and one for the girls to scream at.
Awkward guitar holders too.
Two threads with one post. Never been done before.
Best leg movements ever, tho, those guitarists. Modelled my latter day dance hall style on that. And see where that got me!
The reflexologist?
The physiotherapist?
The candlestick maker?
Are we in Totnes now?
Not only awkward but all left handed.
Those guitarists look like Thunderbirds “beat party” puppets with their strings tangled.
The Dave Clark Five
Back row, L-R: Wheyface, Snaggletooth, Potatonose
Front row: emergency back-up Pretty One, the Tottenham Tosser.
I give you The Fourmost…the pretty one had just left, citing musical differences.
The wind changed for all four, didn’t it?
Of course back in the day you needed a pipe to draw attention to your prettiness.
I know they’ve got their fans, but personally I can’t stick the Mumfords
Chapeau! x3…
Where are the ANIMALS
GUN
ALAN PRICE COMBO
GEORGIE FAME & BLUE FLAMES
STEAMPACKET
JOHNNY KIDD & THE PIRATES
DAVE SAMPSON & ??? (Sweet Dreams)
PETER JAY & THE JAYWALKERS
THE BIG FOUR
THE UGLIES
They’re here now, right at the bottom of this thread. All’s well.
Jack likes to leave the legwork to somebody else. Having ruled out The Blue Flames (hmm – wonder why they were called that?) and The Jaywalkers already, on body count alone, I’m withdrawing my research funding. But still – it’s a list, and we like lists.
Have to throw in a few curved balls every now & again (body count) – G.F. couldn’t use “Famous Flames” was already taken.
Yet again H.P. most responses seem to miss the Original Missive Intent ???
2B fair tho’ Jack, it was a very difficult post to understand. I think on the whole the Massive did pretty well, considering their combined age of the Great Pyramid of Cheops and a negative I.Q. test result.
We may be old, but we still have the cheops…
Yes one never knows what ‘appens when one stirs the pot – as the Fitter says “we still have the cheops…” be they pork or others,
The Big Three – Liverpool
Bern Elliott & The Fenmen
How about Billy Fury & The Tornados – He was a “Spunk” our Ronald.
The Rockin’ Vicars ?
Dave Sampson and the Teen Scene hitmakers The Hunters. You’re welcome.
Relax, ladies, they’re married!
I have seen Dave Sampson and the Hunters live. Bet you haven’t.
… and I bet I’m glad I haven’t, too (spoiler – I’ll win that bet).
See how the one fella plays his bass?
I don’t think he knows what it is. He seems amiably mystified by the whole business.
Thanks for the memory reminder – I.I.R.C. they were a St,Albans/Potters Bar/Barnet area band ala challenge to C.Richard & The Drifters – in the days of Yore.
Brian gets my vote.
AAAAARRRRRRRRRRGHHHH!!!!! Joolz is giving birth to an Alien!!!!!!!
Is that burly, bustling, hard-to-knock-off-the-ball, traditional centre-forward Malcolm ‘Supermac’ Macdonald on the right there?
Because if it isn’t, it should be.
PS Rod, sort your hair out FFS, you’re over-compensating, it’s not a good look.
He’s getting felt up by Long John, right there.
(Rod sniffing his finger? Don’t ask.)
If I could be arsed, I’d start a new thread entitled ‘Was it compulsory for every sixties beat group to include a bloke in Buddy Holly specs?’ But I can’t, so here’s a random selection.
(I was that bloke too.)
This is excellent. You missed out the most famous, though.
Too obvious, I thought.
Love that you”ve snuck in an Austin Powers publicity still, middle right. Bet you thought no-one would notice.
😉
Just a request to the Mod Team – is it possible to put a “sticky” on this thread, so it has a permanent place at the top of the most commented/viewed lists? It’s by some way the most satisfying thread on the forum, with quality comments from top to bottom, and it would be an appropriate way to honor the contributions – many of them wryly humorous! – made by so many of the unsung “little people” of the Afterword! And in these troubled times, it would be a comfort to have it close to hand, to chuckle at again and again!
Thank you for your consideration and agreement in this matter –
H.P. Saucecraft
Give it a rest, you Chicken Slut!
Still here, Moosey?
Allus have been, allus will be.
I’m still waiting for the Mod Team to respond.
Too busy doing their make-up, I expect.
Back in Freezer Lurid’s day, this proposal would have been rubber-stamped and put into effect immediately. I can’t be alone in lamenting the lapse from Reithian standards that obtained during the blog’s Golden Age.
Still waiting. I really have other things to do than hang around here.
You should get on with them.
We know how to get hold of you, should that become necessary.
Thanks, Jeff!