I paused the TV less than ten minutes ago because The Light hadn’t shared the pain of the Rod Stewart single One More Time. Now he’s turned up on Graham Norton playing the same song, so she has suffered it twice in quick succession.

It’s like Ed Sheeran had rewritten Galway Girl for his horny grandad to sing and creep everyone out at a wedding reception. It’s hard to pick the worst line. ‘Together we smashed it’? ‘You taught me how to nasty’ my vote goes to ‘the sex was immense by a good old country mile’. And the video – Rod and a group of blonde women with characterful faces strut around London while he mimes the lyrics.

I wouldn’t have known this unique conflation of words, music and images existed if it wasn’t for Twitter, but now that I do, and have inflicted it on my other half, you’ll have to see it too. Be strong – it might seem like a fortnight in Northampton but it’s really only 4 of the longest minutes of » Continue Reading.