The Afterword

Musings on the byways of popular culture

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Randy Newman’s 20 Greatest Songs

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Randy is a colossus.

I remember my mum surprising me by drawing my attention to a concert of his on TV, he at the piano singing his twisted songs, backed by an orchestra. How could my mum love such an peculiar, discomforting voice? And, he is hardly the best looking human on the planet. But, what brilliant songs. I was impressed. With my mum. And Randy.

There are a small number of artists I mimic at karaoke; Leonard Cohen, Bob Dylan, Lou Reed, Tom Waits, Randy Newman. Spot the similarity.

https://www.theguardian.com/music/2023/jan/05/randy-newmans-20-greatest-songs-ranked

All Hail Lewis Hamilton!!!

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Yesterday, we witnessed probably the greatest sporting achievement in British sporting history. Lewis Hamilton equalled Michael Schumacher’s seemingly unassailable record of seven world championships. Add to that record numbers of Grand Prix wins (94), podiums (163) and polls (97) and you have a true champion of champions who must be the Greatest Ever Formula 1 driver.

He has done this from humble beginnings, a black man in a rich, white man’s sport, with style and panache and a keen sense of fair play. He has always been a clean driver who can never be accused of taking a rival out to gain an advantage. He has developed over the years, starting off, like Max Verstappen now, capable of hair-raising overtakes and wonderfully skilful in the wet, to the ultimate race strategist with an astonishingly sensitive touch, and tyre protector he is now. Throughout, his performances are remarkable for the paucity of mistakes. He has always made fewer than his opponents.

It is often said he is only the best because he has the best car, but only the best drivers find their way into the best cars and only the truly exceptional manage to stay there. However, he has regularly » Continue Reading.

Roget Federer, the Wonder Of Our Age

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What a performance! What a win! At 35, coming back from serious injury after six months of not playing a meaningful game, overcoming his absolute nemesis and his own demons from their previous match-ups. And the manner of the victory – his third five-setter of the tournament, being pegged back twice in sets then losing the opening game of the fifth, to then go again and break Nadal twice – just incredible. One of the pundits made a great point that whilst we recognise Rafa’s tenacity, grit and never-say-die approach as something of a trademark, we have tended to overlook the same qualities in Roger because we are dazzled by the apparently effortless elegance of his game…well, after today we should never be in any doubt that he has The Right Stuff in abundance.

Post one of your farts.

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Now I’m not usually of a lavatorial (u-)bent, but I have been up all night smoking sage and onions and have had a genius idea. Halfway through my final herbal refreshment, I let one go. I mean this really ripped. It was impressive; a world-class trouser trumpet. I got to thinking, wouldn’t it have been great to capture a recording of that and share it with my chums at the Afterword! Yet sadly no audio or video evidence was taken, so you will have to take my word for it: It was the intestinal earthquake to end them all.

For a while I despaired, saddened by the knowledge that no other human being would be able to share in my glory. Then it came to me. There is a way for all humanity to benefit. Get your digital devices primed today people. Learn from my error. When you feel one brewing, hit record. Put them out there on the ‘net. We need to hear your farts!