I don’t wish to get all Peter Kay but I was just fondly remembering the small ads primarily from the MM.
The classified was a jumble of abbreviated band names clearly meant to limit the cost per character. There were requests to form bands such as “Vocalist wanted influences Zep Tull Fairies Crimson. Nantwich. Gigs. No breadheads”.
Or lonely hearts seeking “old lady” into (insert similar bands) reading films.
The mail order albums always had the same bands no doubt early Richard Branson ventures. Bands unlikely to trouble the charts like Seventh Wave, Here and Now or (insert band name from above): the early years (AKA when they were shit). Ronnie Woods solo album seemed to crop up a lot too.
Then there was the clobber. Keep on trucking T shirts or that Genesis one with the girl with the wavy hair. 27 inch loons. And god forbid sheepskin lined denim coats (you could achieve QD).
Happy days.
You forgot, “love, peace, ta”.
And why not? We need a bit more “love, peace, ta”, if you ask me. As a wiser man than me asked, “What’s so funny about peace, love, and understanding?”.
loon pants
Back in 72 when I was 13 I bought a pair of crushed velvet loons from the small ads and had the piss taken out of me mercilessly. I failed to learn my lesson and a year or so later bought a jacket that looked nothing like the picture and was a different colour to what I ordered. Lime green with dark green patch pockets as I recall. Twice bitten, thrice shy in my case.
I had the MM delivered by the local newsagent (remember that?) at the start of the ’70s. I was still at school. My son bought me a copy from that time as a recent birthday present. My favourite writer was Chris Welch and I can still see why I thought that.
I remember all the ads and once bought an album from Virgin in its very early days. It was £1.80. Mail order was an alien and fascinating world to me. I wrote and posted a letter asking about availability and got a postcard back signed “love Wendy, Virgin”. I was, of course, hooked and promptly sent off my postal order.
Wendy was perhaps oversharing a tad there…
I didn’t ever risk mail-order LPs or clothing, instead I bought my duds at Mister Bees down near the bus station in Bretonside (cotton loons for £2.50), and bought my albums here:
Small Ads flogging records rarely started with the phrase RARE!, as so many eBay listing’s do.
Or, in a desperate attempt to be the first ad
Aaaaaaaaasaaaardvark
Or something similar
What like aaaaaaaaaaaardvark?
Oh I remember the classifieds in our local rag growing up, local services etc always began with
AAAAAAAA BETTER CAR TAXIS
AAAAAAAAAANDY’S AMAZING WINDOW CLEANING
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MEMORABLE MASSAGE WITH CINDY
etc
After sitting on the cushions in Virgin and ruffling through the import section with the sleeve corners cut off, I would hie myself to Boodle-Am and purchase a pair of loons and a scoop top t-shirt and possibly some patches to sew on my jeans.
Named after Boodle-Am Shake performed by Johnny Dodds and the Dixieland Jug Blowers, also John Fahey and Jerry Garcia
Were the corners cut off to prevent resales?
They’d been discounted and couldn’t be returned to the distribution company, they were not just imports I’ve read. It was 50 something years ago.
Dickie Branson Tax Avoidance Scheme.
The records were declared for Export, all paperwork sorted, and then not exported and sold in the UK, hence avoiding Purchase Tax
https://slate.com/business/2014/05/richard-branson-tax-fraud-how-a-youthful-indiscretion-helped-create-a-billionaire.html
The ads for mail order albums were invaluable for me, a reluctant resident of a far-flung colony (my gratitude to Cob Records was expressed in an earlier thread). There was also the T-shirt I bought, with the slogan “Support mental health – or I’ll kill you”. At the time I thought this was very witty but can now appreciate why it attracted such strange looks.
NME small ads when I started reading in 1979/1980:
ACME for bondage trousers and Sex Pistols swastika t-shirts, Clash crepe shoes etc.
Concert photos – always ads for prints of The Jam or Blondie’s latest tour
Band ads ‘must be into Gang of Four, no hippies’
Live Page – impossibly exciting venues like The Marquee or the Lyceum always had weekly listings
Instruments for sale
One regret not living in the US was not being able to purchase from these, although we did get some of the stuff over here.
Or selling GRIT,.
Buying sea monkeys too.
I always wondered what the hell Grit was.
Or are you thinking of Grits for breakfast?
https://www.theblondechef.com/grits-two-ways/
They were a mystery too.
OMG, it’s still going!
https://www.grit.com
Small Ads by Small Ads.
A sort of fag end Pub-Rock meets New Wave released on Bronze Records in 1980
They even got a plum spot on Cheggers Plays Pop helping the track to the giddy heights of number 68
I remember that one. Notably, it is the only top 75 single to mention Aldershot. Mike Read played it to death on his R1 breakfast show. So much so I thought that perhaps it was his own band. I recall him playing his own “High Rise” song quite a bit – even having a jingle which modified the song’s chorus.
There may have been some connection Aldershot is about 10 miles from my school in Woking where Mike Read also went.
Their keyboardist went into film making, calling himself Ben Dover. No idea if he went anywhere…
So he went from one upright to another so to speak.
Scoop neck long sleeve grandad vests, probably with stars on them.
Loons, maybe 2 tone.
Long denim coats with white fur collars (flared).
Platform soled boots, often three ply like a big liquorice allsort.
Sunglasses – multiple pairs – I coveted the aviators (mirrored).