Simple premise: the Queen has been on the blower. To celebrate the momentous occasion of her continuing to cling to life and power for a record breaking spell, she has decided to do away with the current national anthem, “God Save the Queen” (“a f**king load of old c***ing ******” is how m’lady described it over the phone just now), and replace it with something a little more uplifting.

Her Royal Highness was initially urged to put the matter of what should be the replacement anthem to a national vote, but Her Excellency has been most dismayed by the performance of our democracy in recent months (I quote again; “those w**king f**kn*ts can’t be trusted to run a f**king p*ss up in a f**king br*wery”), and has therefore opted for a most unorthodox alternative.

Against the better judgement of most of Her Most Extraordinary’s close advisers, this nation-shaping decision will be left in the hands of a rag-tag bunch of what Prince Philip has described as “Black Flag Charlies, Howling Floral Jessies and assorted puckered ne’er do wells”. I’m talking, of course, about you: the denizens of the Afterword blog.

Please post herein your suggestions for the replacement national anthem. … Continue reading Select A New National Anthem