…. I thought as I tapped the picture hook into the wall.
Keen Afterworder’s may remember this fabulous mock–up Afterword ‘cover’ produced by the site’s very own Adobe genius, Mr Grey-Area. I couldn’t believe it when I saw it. It could have not been more fitting.
Fitting as in a risqué 57th birthday present to Mrs attackdog. The image speaks for itself but the important part of the message is, of course, the text. It reads as follows:
Gentleman: Ms puppykins, you have made me the happiest man in the world by agreeing to marry me, because I have never met anyone of the gentler sex with such breadth and depth of knowledge as you possess: of arpeggios, and instrumentation and popular culture.
Ms puppykins: (silently to herself) Mr attackdog, you are indeed a truly gentle man, regarding whom I count myself most fortunate to have met, but I swear that I will bring the towering seas of my wrath down upon you if you ever play your Steely Dan recordings again in my presence, when we are wed.
The seated gentleman: (mutters under his breath) ……. ‘Only a fool would say that …’
I have c ommenteded on here before how, following a ‘cat’s teeth’ argument with my wife a while ago, she signed off with ‘and I HATE Steely Dan’ and, err, flounced off. This really startled me and placed in perspective all the times I have heard her say, ‘is that not enough Steely Dan for a while?’, ‘could you please turn it down a little’. In short I have, for 32 years believed I introduced her to a source of discomfort, leading to often-quarrelsome tetchiness and, yes, ‘wrath’, and have been treading, very carefully, on eggshells.
Well, she thought the print and its message was hilarious. She also revealed her ‘dislike’ of the Dan infliction is nothing to do with me! It turns out that after her first year in Warwick halls of residence she ended up sharing her first second year digs (short lived) with a female who she didn’t really get on with, and who played Steely Dan incessantly! Hurrah. And it only took thirty-two years for her to tell me.
A woman who plays Steely Dan incessantly is a woman I have got to meet. I mean, got to meet.
But only a fool would ask his wife ‘who is she?’