Dude, you used to work with Jedward???

Good advice, especially when there’s tension in the Urals.

Very extreme They Might Be Giants fans.

(yes, that is pretty tortuous innit?)

I fear rough men will lay hands on my tremulous balalaikas.

Pino Paladino’s for frictionless, fretless borders. Booo-dowwww!

The funniest thing about karaoke is to be already in a pub when folk are in mid-caterwaul and watch the faces of people as they come in the door. “Christ almighty… do I really need a drink this much?”

Or, for our friends in Oz, Roy “Penis” Brown – Look at my Chubby.

PS) Fray Bentos – no. Do we have a trade deal with South America? No. You’re thinking of, er, the European Union.

I think that’s how you’d describe my old answering machine.

“You’ve reached Moose the Moose. He might be in, he might be not. Either way, he doesn’t want to talk to you, fuckhead. BEEP!”

It’s not quite as Bushophobe-tastic as the Bertie song. When it gets to the chorus, heavy clouds form above our house and Mrs M starts firing up the chainsaw.

A scene from history, before the debut public performance of The Lark Ascending:

Ralph VW: Right bitches, we’re gonna ascend the shit outta this lark!
The LPO, as one: Fuck yeah!!

So Jacob gets escorted around by his nanny well into his (alleged) adulthood, and Jacob Junior has to be dragged around town by one of his parents?

The very idea!

Two words: Parents. Christmas.

It’s the final countdown….

Seriously, it sounds like Europe. Yecccchhh.

With me around, repulsion is pretty much inevitable.

I believe it was merely a ceremonial role, like President of Ireland. Cutting ribbons, attending horse shows and the like.

Weasels Ripped My Country

(or should that be RIPed…. right ? Riiiiight? Okay!)

I feel the same about People Are Strange. He’s talking about his own life, there’s that terrible hollowness in his voice. “Alienation” doesn’t even cover it, it’s like being in Polanski’s Repulsion. That […]

Why, thank you.

He’s better in quotes, he’s better still in goal.