What does it sound like?:
It sounds like the snapping-on of headbands! Like the sensuous slide of leggings over inadequately-waxed legs! Like the creaking of cartilage! Like the delicate sound of thunder strained through a Lycra© gusset!
What does it all *mean*?
That Mojoworking will be dragging that dusty exercise machine out from under the bed where he put it the day he bought it, and RRRRRRRRROCKING with Lionel!
Goes well with…
Those weird Chinese “glamour” videos you see in Asian hotels … what? me? No, this bloke I know.
Release Date:
Might suit people who like…
throwing their money away, probably. Look – while I’m here – what is this “Autogenerated Heading” field for?
Trombone Shorty eh? One of Lionel’s old pals!
Nothing Lionel likes better than a bell end in his face!
His face? I think you’ve been doing that tromboning all wrong, HP.
Parrrp!
With Lionel Blair, tromboning Shorty, more like.
I thought perhaps you’d have mocked up an album sleeve for vol. 2, but I don’t suppose anything could really beat the original.
Although Lionel has had to beat off over-enthusiastic fans in his time!
This would have been funnier as “Lionel has to beat off over-enthusiastic fans in his dressing room!”
MODS – Is it too late to Edith?
“Let’s face the music and dance….” etc.
That tan makes trump look like an albino.
Just checked Lionel’s wiki entry to verify he really is 89 years old (!) and found that he was born in Montreal. A very open minded city…
Anybody else recall the Shape Up & Dance lps off of the 80s? I did aerobics with my Mum in the front room to those.
Mojo and I had a running thread battle a while back – I was basically saying Lionel Blair is more important to more people than Jeff Beck, and plays better guitar, too. That aerobics album was a key point in my argument. I think I surprised a lot of people with my unusual position.
As did Lionel.
I set ’em up …
Last time I was in the UK I saw he was advertising retirement homes. After all, he likes nothing more than making life better for drooling, open-mouthed men.
Incidentally – that is Geoff Beck’s new album up there – really – I haven’t heard it. Would anyone like to review it? Available while stocks last from selected petrol stations nationwide.
Correction, not Geoff’s (sic) latest album.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loud_Hailer_(album)
Not even latest live album.
Though might be the latest to hit the Eel Market.
I know it’s not “Geoff’s” latest, and it’s (probably) not available at petrol stations. Nor is it, I can reveal, anything to do with Lionel Blair and home exercise workouts. This entire thread was an attempt to lure Mojo back (hopefully to correct the “errors”), backed up with a blizzard of begging emails. From me. All to no avail. He’s happy doing what he’s doing and wants nothing from the Afterword.
So that’s that. Then. As you were.
nice try
Damn, how can we live without regular reminders about the Beezer album? Dandy album? Topper album? Something, whatever.
Yes. I am in regular contact with said gentleman and on numerous occasions have attempted to lure him back to the blog, even suggesting a cunning new nom de plume, but he doesn’t think there is a lot of appreciation for his long form contributions on rock history, culture, great albums of yore etc. I dont agree but perception is reality.
I’m a big fan of MojoWorking or whatever he called himself last time around. I find it a real shame he isn’t around. I always gave him an affectionate ribbing about his wild over-enthusiasm for that Beano thing/the ‘blues boom’ but I’d hate to think that was iun any way part of his absence. Come on, Moje – we need you! 😀
dunno about over -enthusiasm. I think the ongoing references to the Beano album was more of a running gag but that album rightfully sits in the pantheon of influential albums.
As I recall, there were only two actual Beanoid threads – and those in two different manifestations of the Afterword.
Pitifully, I have only made this minor point as an excuse to type the word “Beanoid”
*weeps softly*
Also:
Beezoid
Toppoid
Whizzoid
Dandoid
Richard Hell & The Voidoids
Surely it should be whizzerandchipsoid.
Bit like the affectionate ribbing you get over Johnny McL, but you’re still here, aren’t you?
I have a lot of time for Mojo too. If you want to stay in touch, he is still active on Twitter (using his real name.)
Mojo’s real name is Jeff Beck. Not a lot of people know that.
Jeff Beck was the real-life inspiration for the character of Judith Chalmers on ITV’s Wish You Were Here.
#rock’n’rolltrivia
Gary.
That’s it, really.
Gary.
Imelda May or may not
Darrel High I am
Brian Setz on to yer
Gary US Bonds with yer
Trombone Shorty by name not shorty by..
I’ll get my coat
I’d much prefer watching Lionel Blair pulling off Twelve Angry Men in under two minutes
Lionel Blair! Rhymes with “flair”, “debonair”, “savoir faire”! Even in his terpsichorean twilight years – his Hooferdämmerung, if you will – dear darling Li can still twinkletoe the Chelsea boots off that insufferable interloper Gordeno. Who’s dead, anyway. As too is that chinny arriviste Forsyth now, of course.
For only Li remains: one man tapping on regardless – his patent-black plates all ablaze, jazz hands a-flashin’ – as, armed only with love, devotion and a power perm, he alone is left to kindle the feeble, faltering flame of the one true faith: post-variety light ents.
Echoes of Benny Hill’s Ernie the fastest milk man in the west.
We shall not see their likes again. But we shall not forget. Norman Vaughan. Bruce Forsyth. Dickie Valentine. Possibly someone else. Yes, the US had their Rat Pack. Yes, they had Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin, Sammy Davis, and the other one. But in many ways “our boys” were not only equal but superior to their Yank cousins. They were more affordable, for one. Didn’t mind doing panto, for another. And they were over here already. Bought their own drinks at the bar and left the dressing room as you’d wish to find it. These things matter.
Dickie Henderson,* as well – not just Dickie Valentine.** All the all-round-entertainin’ Dickies, in fact.
* Not related to Joe “Mr. Piano”, as far as I know.
** Not related to Anthony “Him What Was in Callan and Always Played Smarmy Bastards But I Keep Mixing Him Up With Ian Hendry for Some Reason”, as far as I know.
He will not be forgotten, no matter what his name was.
Words I associate with Lionel Blair:
Sparkle.
Blouson.
Shu-zing!
Excellent game, by any standards. Words I associate with Lionel Blair:
Perfumed.
Mandarin.
Demitri.
I thought I’d give this post a bit of a massage to get it up in your faces again.
*fwip-fwip-fwip*
-What’s that noise?
-Van Morrison’s bell-bottoms.
-Ah! Listen to the Lionels.
…..that joke is only two years older than the rest of this thread.
I am disappoint I can’t find Mojo’s and my original epic Jeff Beck/Lionel Blair threads – have they been consigned to time’s dumpster? Forever gone? That would make me cryface emoji.
Yep. Drupal.
Don’t droop, pal.
*cryface emoji*
There there, it might be on Wayback Machine, along with drinks globes, mountaineering and farting. An Aladdin’s Cave of pointless old crap.