I know you’re thinking – obviously J R Hartley – but I’m here to tell you the man was not all that he seemed. He had already bought all available copies of the book from local shops and this daily ritual was a tiresome display of sad narcissism. His devoted daughter, Myrtle, was condemned (by him) to life as a Spinster following the sudden death her mother (Mrs Hartley) back in the 1950s.
She was woken up by noises in her parents” bedroom and when she went to investigate, her father stood at the door, blocking her view. His ashen, bloodstained face contorted into a diabolical gargoyle-like smile. “What have you done, Myrtle?
What have you DONE!?”.
She ran back to her room and hid under the blankets. Sheer terror released endorphins that had the effect of a general anaesthetic. When she came to, her father was downstairs having cheerfully prepared breakfast. Her mother was nowhere to be seen and she was never mentioned again.
So basically, we can cross JR Hartley off the list.
My nominations would be :
Sir Michael Palin
Whispering “Bob!” Harris
Dwayne “the rock!” Johnson
Let’s hear it for the good guys!