Year of Release:2015
It all started in pre-COVID days. My kids were playing MarioKart8 and invited me to have a go. I was awful. I couldn’t master the controls and was lucky to finish the races at all let alone achieve any form of competitive parity with the children.
Well. Two years later, all that has changed. I am now proud to say I have the maximum three gold stars on every level of MaroKart8 – including the fiendish “mirror” level where everything is the same but the wrong way round. Very much like Mario from the 80s, you initially can’t imagine a world where you can possibly achieve the Dragon track or the first Rainbow Road at 200cc but this is something I can now do with ease.
The impressive thing about it s that it gives you “wins” fairly early on. My Twitter post embedded here was early on in this odyssey and remains probably the most skilful passage of play I achieved. I’m impressed by Mario. In the opening sequence of every race sequence, he’s committed and ready – giving it 100%. I have drowned him, had him fall into lava, had him attacked by a vicious spherical “dog” but he’s kept the faith throughout. Never questioning, only giving.
The game made a big fuss of me getting 2 stars on every level – but when I got to the maximum 3 stars, nothing happened at all. It was like having a chisel-jawed, gritty northern parent not even looking up from his paper when his son returns from war with a George Cross.
Might suit people who like:
Lon-term projects that deliver no tangible benefit.
Time Thief Rating:Time? Not so much a relative concept as a black hole