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Foods you hate.

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I have just come off of the forbidden fruit thread & it got me thinking about foods that I dislike, & was wondering if the Massive have any foods they cannot abide.

FWIIW, there are not many on my list, but the first on the list is Marzipan – vile horrible stuff, Prunes – cannot stand them.

Finally, when I was on my travels during my time in the Royal Navy, I used to enjoy eating & drinking food from whatever country I was in.

In Singapore I sampled the Durian fruit – it has the smell & texture of rotting flesh. In Singapore it is regarded as a great delicacy but it remains the single vilest thing that I have ever eaten. The smell is so powerful, that there are signs at the Metro stations say that they are not allowed on the trains.

Awful beyond belief.

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Comments

  1. Mushrooms – slimy spawns of Satan.
    What is the difference between the stuff growing on silver birch trees, the growth on the back of toilet doors, and the stuff served on your breakfast plate?

    Its basically mould – you are eating mould. That can’t be right to put into a human body?

    (The inverse argument to this is that the mould in Stilton is basically the same as the fungus that causes Athletes Foot. And I had a great big, smelly lump of Stilton for lunch today)

  2. Sandwich Spread. Looks and tastes like sick.

    First and last had it over 40 years ago when Tobes’ mum put it in some sandwiches. I ran from the room crying after I put it in my mouth. All this time later it abides as an aftertaste.

    • Still eat the stuff – I convince myself it is the Healty Option and I am getting my 5 a day

      As a kid, we had 3 jars of stuff to spread on bread.
      Crunchy Peanut Butter, Sandwich Spread and Jam (if my parents were feeling benevolent and/or decadent, there would also be Shipphams Paste)
      At the age of 45, my cupboard contains Crunchy Peanut Butter, Sandwich Spread and Jam.

      Sandwich Spread on Toast – lovely!

      Although you’re not alone in your assessment @fin59 – just about everybody I’ve met describes Sarnie Spread as “Vomit In A Jar”

  3. In painfully trendy Oligarchobohemediawankland where I reside, you cannot move for Kale. Singularly, the most pointless foodstuff known to man despite its apparent health giving properties.

    See also Quinoa (keenwah) which would be better used as industrial packing.

    And Sweet Potato can fuck the fuck off as well.

  4. (If I didn’t have diabetes I could eat marzipan every day…mmm!)

    I have a complicated relationship with fruit. I like the flavours but I can’t abide the textures of most fruits, and I also have irrational phobias against most fruits (they feel “unclean” to me and fill me with disgust), so I can only eat pineapple, kiwi, melons and strawberries, any other fruit I can’t eat unless it’s been cooked or preserved in some way.
    And even those four types of acceptable fruit can easily disgust me if I try to eat them too often or if the circumstances are wrong in some equally irrational way.
    I’ll happily eat any vegetable though – I’ve been eating 90% vegetarian for the last ten years. So I do get my vitamines!

    I have a complicated kind of cheese phobia as well – I won’t bore you with the rules and details of which cheeses I can eat and how and when. It’s gotten less complicated in later years but I’m still very tense around cheese…for some reason that I find difficult to understand, this seems to annoy people a lot, even though I never make a fuss or draw attention to this peculiar affection of mine, and let others eat whatever they want. I don’t even talk about it unless they ask, but it still makes people so annoyed that I sometimes wonder if they’re secretly cheese makers and personally insulted by my refusal to eat their products!

    • I like the idea of fruit and eat a lot of berries but get an allergic reaction to many fruits such as peaches, apples, kiwis and pears and also vegetables like carrots or cabbage in their raw state. Similarly, certain nut types.

  5. ‘very tense around cheese’ – me too! Although my tension is just basically a life-long, blanket avoidance of cheese in every form. And I also am surprised by how much hostility it creates.

    Cheese. Even the word is unpleasant.

        • *sobs with incomprehension* HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE CHEESE? HOW? HOW, PEOPLE, HOW?

          It’s absolutely the last foodstuff I would ever give up. It’s the greatest invention of the human brain. It’s art, it’s life, it’s fucking tasty.

          *shakes head in pure bewilderment*

          • I like cheese, as a vegetarian, I eat a lot of cheese (probably too much considering the fat content) but I can’t abide goat’s cheese so I can completely see how someone could “not like cheese”. Most of the time I just avoid goat’s cheese but for some reason, in recent years it seems to be seen as the cheese to use in the one and only vegetarian dish on the menu.

            • My experience too – but any decent restaurant will oblige by substituting the (agreed, repulsive) goats’ cheese with an alternative. I’m not vegetarian but don’t get a lot of pleasure eating a meat-centric meal, so often choose something meat-free on a menu. Get them to replace it with Brie or Gruyère or feta or something. And stop going to restaurants which only offer one vegetarian dish . . . just a suggestion :-).

              • Or order two first courses. I am veggie, and like others have noticed the law which was passed some time around the millennium which mandates goat cheese as the vegetarian option (and often the only one).

                I think the problem is more basic – too many restaurants try to make a meal for an alien group called ‘vegetarians’ and serve that. It would be a lot better if they made and served meat free meals and asked if they would want to eat it themselves.

                • Goat cheese not all bad shocker. I was late getting home after work due to a haircut and an eye test* so I picked up dinner from Tesco, and saw a sweet potato and goat cheese pie in the reduced items. On the grounds that I can’t keep knocking goat cheese without trying it from time to time I had it with roasted asparagus and some salad leaves for dinner. It was really pretty good. End bulletin.

                  * Number three at the back and sides, and an inch off the top, mate, I said to the optician. That test really was overdue.

        • Totally agreed, cheese is the food of the devil. It should be banned. Can’t stand the stuff with the possible exception of a carrot cake where the cream cheese topping is completely masked by loads of sugar etc.

  6. I am pretty much an omnivore. I used to detest parsnips but now love ’em. Ditto mashed swede.
    I have come to dislike ripe bananas, however.
    If they’re still just slightly green-skinned and solid in texture I’ll eat ’em, but the flavour is just too unpleasantly strong once the fruit softens up. I really don’t like the texture when they go soft either. You can forget it utterly, once there is any black on the skin. As far as I’m concerned they are then well past bin time. Nothing banana-flavoured for me either, thank you very much.

    Doesn’t really count as a food, but I’ve never liked rum-flavour toffee. Vile stuff.

  7. Liver.
    Probably just liver.
    OK, just remembered, jam.
    Liver I blame school, who used to deep fry the soles of tramps shoes and serve it with onions.
    Jam was my parents crushing pills in it, hopefully aspirins, still then legal to under 12s, but at times I worry.

  9. Eggs. Vile beyond words. Smell, taste and texture; vile.

    And another cheese hater here. I have tried because it looks great. However it just sits in my mouth like a big lump of wrongness. Which is what it is, of course.

    • How can it be that eggs contribute to some of the finest things in life such as cake and ice cream but are utterly inedible in themselves? Boiled, fried, omeletted – nothing that looks and smells so vile can be intended for human consumption.

      I can’t speak for taste or texture as I have honestly never eaten one which has not been transformed into some more benevolent foodstuff.

        • No to omelettes. Pancakes are about as unadulterated as I face a chicken period.

          It’s not that uncommon, as you find about most things when threads like these start. The Light would agree with others up the page about bananas, and throw them out as unfit for purpose just at the point where I think they are reaching peak ripeness.

      • It’s the two things in combination. I’m glad to see that others in this thread have a problem with ‘context’.

        My partner won’t allow egg yolk to come in contact with baked beans – a dam is built with saus and bacon, for instance, to ensure they won’t mingle. I love offal, and my partner hates it. However, she likes liver pate and faggots.

        I’m very glad that I will eat almost anything, and have my parents to thank for that. Food was never a drama or an ‘issue’.

  11. eat everything that’s put in front of me except for one thing. the food of satan ,cauliflower. its not an anti greens thing ,I will eat and enjoy cabbage, broccilli, sprouts, spinach anything but cauliflower. it makes me so nauseous that if you give it to me by accident I cant eat anything else on the plate, contaminated as it is by the vile white brain lookalike vegetable evil

  12. Got to agree with cucumbers (their only use should be in Pimms), courgettes and marzipan. I have a special revulsion for tripe and all shellfish, it’s said that the first bite is with the eye, if that is the case how come anybody had a second bite at either?.

    Not really food, but while on a trip on the Tibetian plains of China I tried yak butter tea – just the once. Barley flour, black tea and a big dollop of rancid butter made from yak milk – what’s not to like? Other vile liquids I have had the misfortune to try on my travels include Madagascan grey wine, cheap Indian whisky and Bud Lite.

    • In a similar vein I once tried Sezchuan hotpot in China. I don’t know what I was eating but there were several pieces of gristle and tendon flavouring what appeared to be dishwater and with the same consistency. Truly vile but then I saw skinned dogs hanging on meathooks in the market so really shouldn’t be surprised by anything they eat.

      • Noooooo!!!!!

        When I did a birding tour of Sichuan we twice ate hot pot as a group in Chengdu and it was sublime. Granted we let the ground agent (a local) choose the restaurant and being in Sichuan meant there was no seafood at all on the menu but the idea of cooking your own food around a huge deep fat fryer and stockpot was brilliant.

        One thing that sounds a little like your experience was the local “delicacy” of goose intestines. If anyone would like to replicate the taste of goose intestines jut boil a couple of yards of old fashioned knicker elastic in pickling vinegar for 2 or 3 hours, I’m pretty sure the taste, texture and mouthfeel would be similar.

        To finish off a hotpot mean it is traditional to eat/drink a bowlful of the stock that everyone has cooked their food in, I’m not sure how much flavour this would have with just 2 or 3 people using it but when a group of 15 have all cooked in it it was one of the best soups I have ever tasted.

  13. Chicken on the bone, ie chicken wings and drumsticks.

    I can’t abide all the piddling about, gnawing and pulling for stringy bits of dark meat and occasional piece of cartilage. Then having to throw a signicant amount of what you’ve paid for (the bones) away.

    Fuck that. As I like to refer to Mr Barlow’s dwindling barbershop quartet

  14. Olives. Little squishy balls of disgustingness that overpower everything they are added to with their slime and yuckiness. (Olive oil is great, however.)

    Celery. Crunchy, nasty pointlessness.

    Salad generally. I get it: I know it’s good for you, but it’s like food homework- have to do it, hate doing it, can’t wait until it’s over.

    I don’t eat meat and fish (or related products) through choice, but fish genuinely makes me heave at a very instinctual level. Bleughhhhhhhhhhhh.

  15. Parsnips, sprouts, cauliflower, swede and turnips are all evil. I like most other veg, including kale, which works very in stir fries.

    I can’t abide the taste of milk. Haven’t been able to stomach it since I was a nipper, and having to drink more than a tiny sip would make me heave. I can tolerate it with cereal but prefer rice milk.

    Haven’t eaten meat for more than half my life, but even before I stopped I found liver absolutely revolting. And tongue. *retch*

    Also: Chardonnay, which is Satan’s piss. Or is that Stella Artois?

  16. Baked beans.

    Haricot beans = lovely.
    Tomato sauces = no problem.

    Baked beans = unspeakably vile, and there is nothing to do to mask their awfulness in terms of spicing or herbing or cutting with something more palatable. Above all, it’s the texture that I just can’t abide.

  18. I honestly struggle to think of any food I don’t like or tolerate. Possibly ginger cake and even that at a push. But there’s food I will never, ever eat even once… frogs legs and insects.

    Love olives, mussels, brussels, brocoli, liver and most things mentioned above.

  19. Vegetables. I can do peas, sweetcorn and lettuce in a sandwich, but those apart – the spawn of the devil. Nothing worse than cauliflower (even a lovely bit of melted cheddar can’t disguise it’s foulness). And don’t get me started on cabbage!

    Tomatoes are an odd one for me. I can eat anything cooked in tomatoes, tomato flavoured, with tomato sauce etc, but I cannot eat an actual tomato to save my life.

  20. in all my *ahem* years I’ve only found five things I can’t eat:
    1. Marmite
    2. Peanut butter
    3. Raw olives
    4. Beetroot
    5. Tripe

    Everything else is brilliant.

    • I don’t think tripe counts. Nobody eats it out of choice, do they? It’s one of those comedy foods made up by old people to horrify children and make us think that they had it tough back in them days.

        • True. I’ve been in Florence for most of the week, and the way to tell a locals’ restaurant is the proud mention of their speciality tripe in the window.

          Even if I did eat meat the memory of the smell of cooking tripe from my childhood, when my mother, the world’s worst cook in any event, used to claim to enjoy it, though I think she only did it for the pleasure of making the rest of the family gag, would put me off.

          • Tripe. My Mum did indeed cook it from time to time – we lived in a household of great – ahem – austerity, my Mum having learned her cooking skills during the war and the subsequent rationing, and my father having a small income coupled with a pathological parsimonious approach to spending. As you may imagine, it was the kind of household where you ate what was put in front of you and it would not have even crossed our minds that we actually had a choice about eating it.

            Last time I remember a tripe meal – probably in fact the last time my Mum cooked it – she stewed it in milk and onions in a PRESSURE COOKER and unsurprisingly the milk boiled up and blocked the valve; pressure cooker reached about a squillion p.s.i. and blew the top off, making a hole in the ceiling and leaving strands of gooey dripping tripe dangling off the plaster.

            Don’t suppose anyone had a lot of appetite after that, but my memory is hazy as I was only about 5.

      • A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away I had a Saturday job. It was in Grainger Market in Newcastle. Just outside the weigh house my aunt and uncle had an Egg Stall. I was employed to help sell said to the passing populace.

        So for 5 hours every Saturday I was stuck behind this stall facing ‘The Tripe Shop’. On arrival first thing the place was a pulsating mass of yellowish folds of stomach. As time passed this horrible wall of boiled flesh diminished until I could finally see the shop staff.

        They seemed happy enough. Mind, I can’t say this hasn’t regular awful sight hasn’t affected me.

        *soothes self with some calming armpit farts*

  22. The only thing I really hate is faggots. Stop laughing at the back. As in, the pork offal meatball. On paper, I should like them, but I had a visceral loathing of them as a little boy – they literally made me gag and wouldn’t go down my throat. Heart, liver and belly pork – all things I’ll happily eat, being a sucker for offal. But mince them up and serve them in a ball, and I will throw them at you and then be sick on your head.

  24. Pretty much all the stuff I’m not keen on has been mentioned but surely I can’t be the only person that can’t stand tea. It’s not just the taste, it’s pretty easy to avoid drinking tea but the smell of other people’s cuppas is horrible.

    • Typical baffled reaction – What? You don’t drink tea at all?

      No. No I don’t, so just a glass of water would be great thanks. (The people who say this usually can’t be relied on to make coffee worth drinking.)

  26. I have obversed this thread with interest and read every single post with care. There is nothing, I repeat NOTHING, I won’t eat. In fact, I’d happily kill it myself. I’m A Celebrity holds no fears for me!

  28. Brussels sprouts are Satan arse crumbs. Fact.

    Pretty leery of root veg except spuds and carrots. All the others are too sweet and mushy.

    Kale etc – ok if cut into microscopically small bits. NO STALKS! Love cauliflower though.

    Love prawns, but otherwise no shellfish – mussels, cockles, winkles…

    Marrows, don’t hate them, but what’s the point of a food whose only value is as something to stuff?

    • First The Moody Blues, and now you’re having a pop at sprouts too ?

      Sprouts are wonderful. Buttered and peppered. Another food that I once hated but have grown to adore, like celery and parsnips. As for all you shroom, peppers and cheese haters, what can I say ? Who can dislike cress ? A punnet of delight, and as for olives, I’m having some right now.. for breakfast..WITH GOATS CHEESE.

  29. Not exactly food but.,
    Chewing gum – it’s not going in my mouth and I DO NOT want to see it coming out of your mouth.
    One time, I spent ages chatting to this really gorgeous girl. We’ve both had several drinks and I haven’t taken my eyes off her for over an hour. Then, out of the blue, there’s that giveaway jaw movement – through all that talking and drinking the lump of gum was tucked in there the whole time. My heart sank as my stomach heaved..

  30. I take a certain pride in being willing to try anything. Some foods I love, as many I like, and a great number I am indifferent to. But there’s only food that I’ve had as an adult that I would eat again with a revolver to my head. That is the ‘hundred-year egg’ I was once given at a restaurant in Hong Kong. I could not move the throat muscles that would allow me to swallow, so vile was the taste. I had to excuse myself to the lavatory and wait until I was alone there so that I could dispose of it in an unmannerly way.

    Everything else that has been mentioned on this thread is something I’d put on a scale ranging from edible to wonderful.

  32. Peppers; what’s the bloody point of them. They taste of cardboard, horrible things. I had a childhood of stuffed pepper, in salads, bloody everywhere and I’ve never got over my disgust.

    Capers; the taste and texture makes me heave and I won’t go near them now.

    Onions…I have a very curious relationship with the humble onion; love the taste, like them raw but Icooked slimy um vble onion; rtions5

    • Split a red or orange pepper in half ( I agree that green ones are pretty pointless), surround with half a dozen garlic cloves, still in their skins, pour a tiny amount of olive oil over it all, and put in a hot oven. Remove the garlic after 20 minutes and the pepper when the skin starts to blacken (half an hour or so). Peel both to reveal the world’s greatest addition to sandwiches, salads, or pretty much any other savoury foodstuff.

    • Point of order

      There is more vitamin C in a pepper than in an orange. (More things rhyme with it too – like leper ‘frinstance)

      Go for the long pointy ones – really quite sweet actually

  34. Sorry, must stop pressing the wrong buttons.

    I cannot abide slimy cooked onions, it’s a texture thing, not a taste thing.

    Natto. If you’re ever in Japan and you’re offered this for breakfast, SAY NO. It tastes of toilet.

  36. Tinned fish, but mainly because of the smell on opening the can. Particularly tuna. I’ll eat it if there’s nothing else, but I steer clear of actually eating it from choice. Strangely I’m rather fond of fresh fish.

    Not mad keen on avocado – it tastes a bit like mushy grass. Guacamole however I can cope with (usually because it’s mixed with something else).

  44. Raw celery.
    Goats’ cheese.
    Anything battered (or crumbed) and deep-fried.
    Tea.
    Fried egg.
    Salad cream.
    Plastic white sliced bread.

    Then there’s a food I absolutely love, having eaten it once or twice by mistake: scallops. Allergic, though, so I give them all back a few hours later.

    • Salad cream / mayonnaise for me too. I think it’s the egg thing mentioned above; I don’t even trust any dressing which looks like it might be mayo based unless I make it myself. It’s the baby batter of Satan and should be shunned as such.

  45. Kentucky Fried Chicken. Deep frying chicken – what, it’s not greasy enough? Doughballs. Funnily enough, they’ve never become trendy. Rump steak – like chewing a bowling ball. Pumpkin – the sort of veg pigs would turn their snouts at. Pigs snouts – tried in in Hong Kong – thought someone was having a laugh. Garfish – Aussie fish, bonier than Ghandi, like eating your teeth after you’ve been beaten up.

  46. I’m quite surprised at this thread. I love food, all sorts of food, have even enjoyed durian, mentioned way up there, when I used to visit Singapore regularly years ago.

    However there are some things I don’t like, but hate is too strong a word.

    I’m not a big fan of chocolate. I enjoy it sometimes, but I can leave it. And if I don’t eat it for a while I don’t miss it at all.

    The only other things I can think of are: cold tea and cold coffee. Infact coffee as a flavour at any time, except as a drink. Hot strong coffee is my favourite drink, with a tea a close second. Whisky next. But cold coffee, or coffee flavoured cakes or anything like that. Just no.

    • With on the one about loving coffee but not coffee flavoured things. Two reasons I can think of – the flavoured things are usually cold, and they usually involve using coffee with milk in some way, which will be a capital offence come the glorious day of my ascension to ruler of the World. You can keep the tea to yourself though.

      • I’m the opposite – I can’t drink coffee, it’s absolutely vile, but I don’t mind coffee flavoured cakes, desserts etc, will happily drink a Black Russian as well.
        It’s weird, when you think about it!

        • It is odd, how the taste can be fine when hot/cold, but not the opposite. Tea and coffee are the only things I’m like that with. I can’t think of any other foods or drinks that I’m temperature dependent on to enjoy them.

  48. Milk. Gak. You wouldn’t drink anything else that squirted out of a mammal, would you? Well, maybe on its birthday.

    I think it comes from being forced to drink milk at school after it had stood on a sunny windowsill for three hours and had a glob of warm phlegm where the cream should be. Still makes me shudder to think of it. I have the ‘white water’ version on my cereal and that’s it.

    • I got made a milk monitor so I could abuse my power and skip my desk when handing it out. People often find it distasteful that some children still breast feed at the age of two or three, without acknowledging that the vast majority of adults breast feed, we just steal the milk from another species to do it. Vastly stranger behaviour than eating it’s flesh.

  50. Asparagus tips.
    Sounds like some sexually transmitted disease that one of jackthebiscuit’s friends would come into contact whilst ashore in Malta.
    Looks like a sexually transmitted disease also.

  51. Most Sauces:
    Red and Brown Ketchup
    Tartare Sauce
    Mint Sauce
    Horseradish sauce (also Wasabi)
    Salad Cream
    Mayonaisse
    Raw Cheese – will eat mild cheese cooked in Lasagne, Cauliflower Cheese, Moussaka.
    Parmesan Cheese and Cottage Cheese (See above)
    Beetroot
    Malt Vinegar – makes me gag – though I do like pickled onions.
    Sandwich Spread
    Piccalilli
    Branston Pickle
    Tinned Salmon and Tinned Tuna
    Coleslaw
    Potato Salad
    Mushy Peas
    Faggots
    Not mad on Sweet and Sour Sauce (Chinese)
    Mustard of any variety.
    Rum or anything rum-flavoured.
    Marzipan
    Yoghurt
    Capers
    Mixtures of mash and mince – Shepherds Pie, Cottage Pie etc.
    Pies/Pastry generally apart from Chicken/Leek (and Ham), Fish Pie, Victorious Pie, Fidget Pie – larger home made type.
    Sausage Rolls.
    Cream – can take it or leave it.
    Crab/Lobster

  52. I forgot – any Salad Dressing -No, No, NO – unless it’s a little Olive Oil plus lemon

    Balsamic Vinegar – an abomination – get rid of it!
    Thousand Islands Dressing.
    Hollandaise

  53. For genetical reasons, I hate Cilantro, it’s not an allergy, it’s a something with my tastebuds. I left a plate of thaïland food at a street food stand with both shopsticks standing in it, for an owner that after serving me meals with cilantro more that five times over a month, told me that I had to remove the leaves by myself.

    The funny thing is that only person I ever met with the same cilantro problem was a colored man born in africa that I was born a bad person, being a white man, I can’t tell what he felt when I told him that we shared some specific genes…

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