Here is chapter 15 of my story, my journey with cancer. I’m sorry that it follows so soon after yesterday’s but so many friends have asked, ‘what happened on Friday?’ That it seemed unfair to hold this back any longer. Thank you to everyone who has read any of meanderings; I’m enjoying writing them and you feedback means the world to me and Janet.
https://njbrannigan-zvxuy.wordpress.com/2026/02/15/diary-of-a-lump-15/
Fuuuu-uuuuuck, as they say on the telly, when something bad happens. I wasn’t expecting that either….. I can’t believe I could remain as philosophical as you. Best wishes, Bud. We may have never met but I feel I know you.
And I admire Dr Booth’s conviction about the advancement of medical science overtaking the march of Gregor; how very 3 Body Problem and as believable. (As in I found the inherent premise underlying it believable.)
@retropath2 Thank you, my friend 🙏
That was a tough read, and a tougher message for you to receive. I’m so sorry for you and Janet.
BUT. They’re bringing out the big guns for your defence against it. It hasn’t spread and was caught early. And you have the right mindset and resilience to get through this, and you have Janet by your side. And, as the doc said; next time around, science will know more and do better.
I expect you to be around for a very long time.
@Locust I’m going nowhere. Gregory Spawton, the leader of Big Big Train, just sent me a lovely message recommending Bruce Dickinson’s book for the chapter on his journey through throat cancer. I thanked Greg and said I was focusing on the end of September and the first night of BBT’s tour, at The Stables in Milton Keynes. He replied, “Then I look forward to seeing you and Janet at the show.” I’m going nowhere, my friend 🙏
Oh Lord! What a bummer.
Real heroes are baffled by the adulation because they feel no fear. You are a hero, Niall, but Janet is the brave one.
Love and best wishes to you both.
@Tiggerlion Thank you. She’s my rock 🙏
Dear God. (and I’m a humanist agnostic.)
You are doing this as well as anybody could, and we are all alive until we are not. As the doc said, by the time one thing finishes, there may be new wonders to implement. Live life.
While you are at it, none of us should put things off for a rainy day, so wear the best gear and crack the stash of whatever you have been holding for … when? Now sounds like a good time to me.
@Vincent Thanks 🙏
The nick of time, and the best available medicine, that is encouraging. All best vibes from here too, to the pair of you.
So do sorry to hear this news Niall. I think you are exactly right to focus on a future Big Big Train gig to help you get through the days ahead of you. And when that gig has come and gone there will be something else
You and Jan will challenge this every step of the way. Routing for you mate .
@SteveT Thanks bud. 🙏
@Vulpes-Vulpes Thank you 🙏
Im sorry as a cancer survivor I can’t read this but I’m sending you all my love.
@Clive Just knowing you’re there is enough 🙏
As I’ve said before: well done for seeing it and saying it, which means it can get sorted. Too many men don’t mention anything until it is too late.
Getting a diagnosis of an incurable illness in your middling years doesn’t have to be a life sentence. As long as the disease can be kept in remission, you should be able to carry on pretty much as before. You’ll just be more aware of what your body is signalling, and get checked out that much quicker.
Crohn’s isn’t going to kill me (now) because I’m much more conscious of it, and I respect its ability to mess me up if I ignore it, so I follow doctor’s orders to the letter. As a result, I’m far healthier at 55 than I was at 45 (and was at 35). My biggest change in lifestyle came because of UV hypersensitivity (a side-effect of the chemo). We now can no longer visit Mrs F’s Spanish rellies in high summer, so we go at Easter instead. You might well find something has shifted after this round of chemo is over.
@fentonsteve Yes, I’ve been reading up on UV issues. Thanks for your support 🙏
Always read the small print on the bit of paper that comes in the drugs packet before you toss it into the bin. Be alert – the world needs more lerts, etc.
Crikey Niall this is becoming almost unbearable for the reader never mind the writer but also totally unputdownable. I am struck equally with sadness alongside absolute awe of your strength in such difficult circumstances. All power to you and Janet.
A neighbour told me this week that on 17th we enter the year of the fire horse which in Chinese mythology is both very rare and powerful. It’s considered a time of intense, transformative energy and we should all manifest positive thoughts. A load of old b******s maybe but let’s all give it a go!
@Feedback-File Sounds good to me 🙏
I have several people close to me going through variations of this so I have to ration my engagement but you know you have all my positive vibes. I’ll just say one of my friends was diagnosed with incurable prostate cancer 4 years ago and went on experimental hormone treatment and is still rocking on so stay positive amigo.
@Twang That’s the kind of story I want to hear. Thanks 🙏
I confess I had something in my eye at this latest episode. Like others round here I don’t really want to think about cancer or its treatment because reasons, but your narrative is, dare I say it, compulsive reading. I’ve never met either of you and it’s unlikely I ever will, but I feel I know you. And I’m in awe of the strength of the relationship you and Janet have.
If I may go off at a tangent, drug names, eh? Acalabrutinib, R-Bendamustine, Aciclovir…and from my own cocktail, Apo-Irbesartan, Trelegy-Ellipta…what’s the matter with these people? Do they have meetings where they compete to come up with the most incomprehensible names, and if they sound like anagrams so much the better? Gah. I diskard them utterly.
Drug companies are superb at conjuring up a memorable catchy name for their own product while making sure the generic term is a tongue twister.
Drug companies don’t conjure up the generic name – as I’m sure you will know, Tiggs…
https://theconversation.com/why-are-drug-names-so-long-and-complicated-a-pharmacist-explains-the-logic-behind-the-nomenclature-164148
Yes. They are still tongue twisters, though.
@mikethep Thanks 🙏
As hard as it is to read these, they are absolutely riveting – and Janet is amazing.
@Malc She absolutely is 🙏
Sorry to hear of the diagnosis Niall and continued best wishes for your ongoing recovery.
But, you have three things in your favour…. The early diagnosis, the continued advancement of cancer treatment (side note – for those that can afford , please support Cancer Research – they do a wonderful job) and the wonderful support from Janet.
All the very best to you.
@Chrisf Yes, I would add Macmillan nurses to Cancer Research as deserving causes that make a huge difference. Thank you 🙏
I’m sorry to hear this has taken a disturbing turn, but admiring the way you’re reacting to it. I’d guess it’s important to focus on the pleasures that can still come along. All the best.
@rotherhithe-hack Thank you 🙏 Yes, every positive is a little jewel.
That was tough to read, and I’m sorry that you are both having to go through this stuff. I’m not sorry that Gregor is going through what’s coming to him though, he deserves it. Sounds like they have saved some of the good stuff for you; when I was very sick I also had an experimental treatment and have had a couple of other ones since. No regrets. You are seeing the NHS as it is meant to be seen – an absolute machine.
Also when I was sick, I woke up from surgery and made arrangements to see King Crimson at the RAH for their 50th Anniversary. That was motivating for me, and it was great to see them when I got there (and also talk to some of the band!)
Big Big Train should serve as a similar motivation for you. They just put out the album of their career so far, and it’s going to be played in front of you.
Take each moment as it comes, Niall. Treat it as an experiment, to observe and to learn. You’re already doing all this stuff anyway. So just keep on keeping on.
@Leffe-Gin Perfect, thanks 🙏
Niall, this was genuinely upsetting to read, god knows what it must have been like to live.
Your bravery, honesty and self awareness are an absolute example to us all. Thank you again for allowing us all to intrude on what might otherwise be a very private process.
I’m sure I won’t be alone in keeping you in my thoughts in the coming days. You deserve only good things, so I hope that good things are heading your way soon.
@Bingo-Little Thank you 🙏