I’ve never taken much notice of conspiracy theories but ………
I had my first Covid vaccination yesterday afternoon.
This morning I got an email from
Gates.Bill@microsoft.com
I haven’t bought any gates so I was a bit puzzled
It read:
Congratulations on having your first Covid vaccination and participating in our VACC-TRAK programme.
Here is your first monitoring report.
1. You should get up earlier
2. The roast lamb you had yesterday was very popular with your taste receptors. Please send us the recipe.
3. These are trying times for everyone but there is no need for that sort of language.
Yours observantly
VACC-TRAK
Should I be worried?
Moose the Mooche says
I’ll let you know after I’ve have my first jab in about 2027.
Rigid Digit says
Just before half past eight this evening?
Moose the Mooche says
We’ll have none of that European rubbish.
Black Celebration says
I know someone who I consider a bright person but he’s been completely beguiled by conspiracy theories. So much so that that his teenage son bet him $100 on New Year’s Day that Biden *would* be inaugurated on Jan 20, as planned. My friend was convinced that some great truth which involved alien life was about to be revealed and Trump would assume control in the ensuing chaos.
Jaygee says
Please don’t spread the below around….
A friend of a friend who has a mate whose pal is the ex-wife of someone who’s chummy with the occasional squash partner of a man who does a frightfully hush-hush job high up in the government told me that the 70-plus people who get vaccinated in the UK have all been given deadly poisons that will slowly kill them over the course of a few months. The ultimate aim is to free up housing to make room for the expected influx of 4,000,0000 or so Hongkongers who will be given BNO-passport so they can flee to the UK from China
Moose the Mooche says
I won’t be spreading the below around, no sir.
Timbar says
You must have had the Pfizer jab then.
The AstraZeneca vaccine, being British, has an Amstrad chip in it – like that’s going to work!
Moose the Mooche says
It simply tells the virus, “You’re fired”.
The virus later turns up on a game show on channel 5.
hubert rawlinson says
The AstraZeneca vaccine, being British has two cocoa tins and a length of string chip.
SteveT says
But it’s not really British though is it. The Swedish half I fear will have the same traits as a well known Swedish furniture company – cheap as chips but not fit for purpose after six months.
fentonsteve says
I don’t mind the prospect of Uncle Bill knowing what I’m thinking about. Let’s face it, it’s going to be “records” most of the time.
What scares me is if it is connected to my Discogs account. Bankruptcy ahoy!
Tiggerlion says
Don’t you think of sex every three seconds like the rest of us?
fentonsteve says
I am far too dull for that. But now you’ve mentioned it, I have now.
Moose the Mooche says
I have to wait two seconds??
bobness says
“I haven’t bought any gates so I was a bit puzzled”
I absolutely see what you did there.
Well played.
Jaygee says
While he may not have bought any gates, he could well have bought some windows
Dave Ross says
Had the Pfizer jab on Friday. Bill Gates is already so sick of 80s synth pop duos that I’ve had an email requesting I “change the bloody record or he’ll get one of his people to do it for me” Careful what you wish for Billy boy you wait till Colin H has his….