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The gender wars of household chores – do you find this comic strip patronising?

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Someone I know “liked” this on Facebook. Hmmmmmmm.

I’m kind of wary about posting it here, as gender arguments can be fractious. But… I don’t know, I just find it really patronising. For those who can’t be bothered reading it all, a feminist artist called Emma has written a comic strip about how men in general unfairly expect women to bear the brunt of household chores and organisation. Not only this, but men make it worse by taking the “well you should have asked me to do that if you wanted it done!” stance, because it forces women into bearing the “mental load” for either doing things themselves or telling their men to do them.

I kind of get what she is saying. Imbalance in hygiene/cleanliness/organisational standards in a relationship can be an issue, sure. But a concept like the “mental load” sounds to me like the worst kind of passive aggressive twaddle – at worst, an excuse for a control freak personality. And then to turn this into a gender issue??

The worst bit is near the end, when she pre-empts men (like me) who are reading the strip and thinking, “I’m not like these men she describes”… apparently, » Continue Reading.

I prefer emails and texts to phone calls – am I mad or sane?

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One of the things that annoys me at work more than anything else (and in fact in life in general) is playing phone tennis with someone – you call them and miss them, they call you and miss you because you are way from your desk for a minute, and so on.

I hate phone tennis. And I’m definitely an email person. To me, emails are perfect because they allow you to put your message out there (your carefully drafted, polite message) and give the recipient time to consider a response and reply at their convenience.

I’ve decided there are two types of people – verbal people and writing people. I’m definitely the latter. And I have little patience for people who, after a long email conversation, will need that actual verbal conversation at the end of it to put a full stop on it and finalise what’s been discussed. I’m the opposite – I can have a long verbal conversation (to me, just waffling around the subject) and then I’ll ask you to put in writing what’s been agreed, just to confirm it.

Are you an email person (yay- efficient, logical, decisive) or a phone person (boo – waffling, » Continue Reading.

Anyone else watched the Twin Peaks finale yet?

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It’s all too mind blowing for me to attempt to write up a proper review, but I loved it. I thought it was perfect. If this work ends up as Lynch’s last film/TV project, it will be an incredible end to a fascinating career. A head spinning, cantankerous, unique, chilling vision – astonishing for a man now in his seventies.

From the internet storm today, I gather the finale has been quite controversial. But to the people who were perplexed, I want to ask what did they expect? Anyone who has seen Lost Highway and Inland Empire must have known what to expect.

Anyway, I loved it.

You?

Dunkirk

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Year: 2017 Director: Christopher Nolan

What an incredible film.

You know how Christopher Nolan’s last few films have fallen into a similar pattern? You get a long, slow buildup with lots of talking and philosophising, then eventually you get three or more storylines reaching a simultaneous peak with multiple, cross-cut suspense sequences? While effective on a technical level, it was all starting to seem a little contrived. And bordering on pretentious.

Well, in a stroke of genius, Dunkirk ditches the buildup and plugs you straight into the cross-cut suspense stuff. I was absolutely hooked within seconds. Forget back-story, forget character-building, forget dialogue, forget quasi-intellectual theorising – Nolan strips all that out. This is just an edge-of-your-seat struggle for survival, with the bare minimum of context and explanation.

It’s Nolan’s tautest film since Memento by quite some way, and should hopefully cement his reputation as the A list director he’s always threatened to be. With a constantly building succession of cliffhangers (all scored by Hans Zimmer’s trademark pulsing slabs of orchestral music), it’s the most buttock-clenching piece of cinema since Captain Phillips.

The colour palette is creamy and vivid, the sound design is a masterpiece of sustain and release (waves lapping, » Continue Reading.

Let’s do a mixtape! Yeah!

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Baby Driver and Guardians of the Galaxy are two films this year which have reminded me how sweet it feels to compile a bunch of eclectic tracks into a mixtape. Ditto the CD swap thread here (although I didn’t join in with that and kind of regretting it).

Let’s do a mixtape together!

The rules.

– No theme. That’s just pretentious. It just needs to flow from one track to the next. You need to keep the listener listening.

– It’s a C90, so we are having two sides of 45 minutes each. (46 at a push).

– I’ll start. You all have a think about what track to put next – first person to post the next track has got it. And so on until we fill both sides.

– To prevent time wasters and comedians, there’s a three veto rule. If any track gets three vetos before someone suggests the next track -its getting recorded over. But once someone has suggested the next track it’s too late – we’ve moved on and you can’t veto any more.

– This might end in chaos, or indifference, or a beautiful mixtape!!!

– Or you might all veto my starting track » Continue Reading.

Anyone else still watching Twin Peaks?

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We’re almost halfway through the 18 episode run, and I absolutely adore it. The contrarian in me loves the fact it seems absolutely calculated to turn off casual fans.

Gone is that comforting, hokey feel. Gone is the warm glow, gentle humour and constant bubbling lounge jazz.

Instead, the horror and weirdness have been turned up to 11, there is still no sign of a discernable, traditional plot, and most of the original cast have been reduced to mere cameos (some only seconds long).

It was getting strange enough, but then episode 8 went off on some entirely unexpected path. No spoilers from me – you need to experience it for yourself.

The music has been uniformly brilliant and often shocking. We’ve had Nine Inch Nails, Take Five and Green Onions.

I’d never dare have hoped it would have been this good. I expected a watered down thing at most – Lynch tamed for TV. But this is more out there than Mulholland Drive and Inland Empire combined.

Anyone else still a fan?

Twin Peaks reactions thread – SPOILERS

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Against my better judgement, I got up at 2am to catch the new Twin Peaks.

I don’t think I was prepared for how… different it is. Too early to tell yet whether I’m going to like it or not. The tone of the original is COMPLETELY gone. And it’s ugly as anything: Not ugly in a scuzzy, dirty way, but just flat and HD in a way that doesn’t suit the lushness we were always used to.

And it’s as slow as death.

But there’s that unmistakable sense of creeping dread that is pure Lynch. I’ve got the feeling I’ll be hooked within a couple of episodes. I can’t wait to see where it goes.

Twin Peaks – Fire Walk With Me

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Year: 1992 Director: David Lynch

It IS happening again…. finally… After all these years, Twin Peaks is coming back later this month for a third and final season. It might well be all too much (18 episodes, ALL directed by Lynch himself) – but I can’t wait. And my threshold for disappointment is very high. It would need to be very bad indeed for me to fault it (says he who loves Inland Empire, a film that even staunch Lynch fans find impenetrable).

The Glasgow Film Theatre currently has a David Lynch season, this being the highlight. One of the selling points of this screening (apart from being LATE on a Friday night) was that it was a 35mm print. But… em… that just meant it was VERY crackly and the sound was quite badly distorted. I didn’t realise they meant the actual print from 25 years ago. It made me appreciate the benefits of digital restoration, which I think suits Lynch better.

Still, it’s a film that needs to be seen on a big screen. You need to hear Laura Palmer’s horrific screams and the house band in the Pink Room at full blast on big cinema speakers to » Continue Reading.

The Beatles in 1970

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My current obsession with The Beatles continues and I apologise to no-one for this…. This is a bit of fun, so please just look away if you’re fed up talking about the Best Band Ever (TM)…

This week, I’ve been wondering what their album in 1970 would have sounded like if they had stayed together just a little while longer. I think I’ve figured it out.

Let me take you back to late summer 1970….

George Martin is out of the picture (so gone is the polish of the Abbey Road LP), but Lennon and Harrison have both been recording with Phil Spector. They both still love Ringo, who acts as a bridge between them. Ringo puts his own solo career on hold for a chance at one last Beatles LP. And Paul decides, on the eve of putting out a press release saying he’s left the band, to hold off for just a few more months and donate a few tracks to the project. (Paul refuses to work with Phil Spector, however – so all his tracks are solo-produced. He even falls out with Ringo over the fact that he wants to play all his own drums).

I think » Continue Reading.

The Beatles – Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (1967)

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What does it sound like?:

This isn’t a review of the fiftieth anniversary edition (due next month).

That edition is going to be a full remix job. Presumably they’ve tamed the hard stereo separation (drums in one ear, vocals in another, etc), tidied up some of the vocal fluffs and replaced the EMI Studio echo chamber with some surround-sound digital reverb. I’m excited, but I’m also a little sad as it feels a bit like losing an old friend. (Nothing sounds as majestic as that EMI Studio echo chamber – skip to the line “… in his way, Mr K will challenge the world!” on “Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite” to hear it in all its glory).

Anyway, I felt it was time to prepare my ears by giving the trusty old original edition another spin. Please excuse my indulgence as I try to put this experience into words.

The first thing to say is, naysayers be damned. Pepper is a fine, fine piece of art.

It forms the point where pop music grew up, started taking itself seriously and forming an actual legacy instead of assuming it would fizzle out any day. There’s a horrific bitter-sweetness » Continue Reading.

What do people think of Game of Thrones (the TV show, not the books)?

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I’ve just finished catching up to the end of the last series of Game of Thrones (just in time for the new series later this year). After poo-pooing it for ages I finally succumbed last year and within four of five episodes was completely addicted. The last two series each only took me a few days each to watch, once I got into the “binge” mentality.

I had thought about writing a review of them, but it all seems to big to sum up. I am now one of those annoying people who find it hard to explain exactly why you should give up fifty hours plus of your life, but insist “well, you just have to watch it and see!”.

I really struggle to put my finger on what’s so good about it though. In fact, I secretly suspect it’s not even that “good”, objectively speaking, but just has so many storylines and characters crammed in you focus on the good bits and forget the bad bits.

I’m still a bit uneasy with all the sex and nudity. It really does seem gratuitous and awkward (yes, I’ve turned into my dad). More importantly, it makes it difficult to watch » Continue Reading.

Get Out

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Year: 2017 Director: Jordan Peele

This little film is so perfect, you’ll find yourself giving a standing ovation over the end credits. I hesitate to call it a horror, despite plenty of jump scares and some stomach churning gore in the last act.

But good horrors often make you doubt they are horrors at all. A young black man visits his white girlfriend’s parents in an affluent New Hampshire neighbourhood for the first time and… SOMETHING’S not right. Despite her assuring him beforehand that her family aren’t racist, everyone seems to be treating him with suspiciously veiled politeness. And the only other black faces he sees belong to servants and groundkeepers. You want him to, well, ‘get out’, but you can also see what compels him to stay and face up to whatever is actually going on.

Things get weird. And then violent. I was a bit worried for a while that it was going to be one of those films that leave matters unanswered and expect the audience to make up their own minds. I’m all for open endings, but with a mystery as compelling as this, it would just be cheating.

You want the loose ends tied up. » Continue Reading.

Nominate your favourite Chuck Berry COVER

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Because I think the covers of his songs are just as important (if not more important) than the originals.

I’ll bypass Marty McFly doing Johnny B Goode and suggest that The Beatles singing Rock And Roll Music must be one of their most joyous moments.

David Bedford with Mike Oldfield – The Orchestral Tubular Bells (1975)

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What does it sound like?:

I’ve found myself casually dropping the Tubular bomb into various different conversations on these boards recently. So the 1973 LP is obviously on my mind.

But I’d thought I’d be obtuse and review the orchestral version that came out a couple of years later, in 1975. Even extreme Tube-heads might not have taken the time to check this out, so let me be your guide.

Enter Mike Oldfield.

Oldfield is the kind of musical child genius who makes the young Kate Bush look like a slacker. A prodigious guitarist and enthusiastic multi-instrumentalist, he built up the Tubular Bells composition as a kind of musical therapy in his insular teenage years. The huge, unexpected success of the LP (two long-form instrumentals, each a side long) scared the then twenty year-old half to death and sent him into hiding in the countryside.

(Connoisseurs like me also have a special place in our hearts for his two follow-up LPs, Hergest Ridge and Ommadawn. Never again would he scale such beautiful, pastoral heights).

Enter David Bedford.

Bedford (sadly, recently deceased), in his thirties when Tubular Bells came out, was a music teacher and a composer of modernist » Continue Reading.

Pink Floyd BBC Sessions brought to you by Colin H

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Recently, Colin H tried to upload some Pink Floyd BBC session tapes he acquired (I know not how), but fell foul of the technical jiggery pokery needed. So I offered to help out (or rather, he asked for a volunteer and no-one else offered).

Anyway, here they are! If I’ve done this right, there should be a link here which will allow you to download them. Thanks to Colin for doing all the hard work in copying these to CD in the first place!

The bad news first. The recording of Apples and Oranges is NOT a long lost session recording. I could tell straight away the quality and balance was that bit better than yer average sixties BBC session, and comparing it to the single recording confirms it. Yes, it’s just a straight copy of the single version. I’ve no idea why this would have been stored on tape, but there you go.

Listening to these reminds my of how embryonic and frankly amateurish the early Floyd were. Syd really couldn’t play the guitar for toffee, could he? (There’s a point on these tapes where the guitar suddenly sounds better, and then I realise that’s where Dave Gilmour replaces » Continue Reading.

Let’s talk about James Blunt

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Did anyone see James Blunt on the Graham Norton Show on Friday? (Still on BBC iPlayer, for those in the UK).

I can’t work out if it was car crash telly or not. I was certainly mouth agape.

After spending over a decade as the butt of a joke, he’s relaunching his career with a song that sounds like a child’s first attempt at RnB, and lyrics that (literally) talk about how: – he’s “a bit of a d**k” – he’s”a bit sh*t” – he wonders why his wife loves him because he has wandering eyes – etc

I can’t work out whether it’s a brave confessional stance, or an actual joke.

It sounds like a comedy song. If Ricky Gervais had him as a guest star on Extras, this is exactly the kind of thing he would have him sing.

James himself seems immensely unsure of himself. Like a rabbit in headlights.

I’m torn between being impressed at his bravery and feeling pity for him. Maybe that’s the plan?

Everybody Wants Some!!

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Year: 2016 Director: Richard Linklater

I’ve loved director Richard Linklater since I saw his debut film Slackers in the early 90s (part of me still wants to move to Austin, live in a squat and start a band because of that film). He’s eclectic, unpretentious and I don’t think there’s another director alive whose philosophy on life most matches my own.

Everybody Wants Some!! is a Buddhist manifesto disguised as a frat house comedy. There’s no one I can think of apart from Linklater who could weld such unlikely concepts together so seamlessly.

There’s a deep rooted connection to its predecessor, Dazed and Confused, from 1993. That film (itself inspired by American Graffiti) explored the bittersweet freedom and sense of possibility on the last day of high school, 1976. Everybody Wants Some!! jumps forward to the next natural life step – the first day of college. And it’s now 1980.

Our ensemble cast focuses on a house shared by a group of horny jocks on baseball scholarships. It’s three days until term starts, which they spend chasing girls and getting seriously out of their faces.

That might not sound appealing. And to be honest the sexism and laddish humour is » Continue Reading.

Metallica -Some Kind Of Monster

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Year: 2004 Director: Joe Berlinger

It can’t be said enough – you don’t have to like Metallica to like this documentary. Personally, I think their music is awful, but that’s part of the fun here.

During the period this film covers (2000 – 2003), the band went through a bit of an identity crisis. Struggling to record a new album, they battled with such pressures as their lead singer (James Hetfield) going into rehab, family commitments, creative blocks and a legal battle with the online music streaming service Napster (remember Napster?).

Such are the troubles of a bunch of terminally adolescent multi-millionaires. For a good portion of this film, the temptation is strong to just shout “Oh, grow up!” at the screen. It’s hard to maintain any kind of affinity with them when, for example, Hetfield misses his son’s first birthday to go bear hunting in Siberia. Or when drummer Lars Ulrich laments the fact he has to sell some of his art collection to make more room in his house. (He makes a few million at the auction, which eases the pain a bit).

But there are also cutting truths on show here, and it’s a credit to the » Continue Reading.

I still can’t believe it’s 2017 already.

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Isn’t Time cruel? Why does it fly by so fast? Where are all the years going?

If you asked me when the Afterword started, I’d probably guess around last year some time. But I bet you it was 2009 or something.

And when did George Harrison die? Couple of years ago, something like that?

I hate getting old.

Six Degrees of Separation

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I’ve no idea if this will have any traction, or if it’s been tried before, but anyone fancy a game?

Let’s play Six Degrees Of Separation, but with musicians. Take any two musicians and link them in six steps or less, via musicians they’ve either recorded with or shared a stage with.

To take an easy example, Kate Bush to Jimmy Page might be: Kate Bush > recorded (a few times) with David Gilmour, who > played on Have A Cigar with Roy Harper, who > played Stormcock with Jimmy Page.

So, here’s one to start with. These are two names off the top of my head, I don’t have an answer in mind:

Diana Ross to Bon Scott.

Anyone want to try? First to get it can suggest another name to link Bon Scott to and keep the chain going.

Dire Straits – Love Over Gold (1982)

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What does it sound like?:

By the time of their fourth album, Dire Straits had experienced that now rare luxury of having time to grow and develop. A fiery live act, centred around Mark Knopfler’s astonishingly fluid guitar playing (and an uncannily tight and sympathetic collective ability as a group – check out their Old Grey Whistle Test appearances), they sometimes had the tendency on their first three albums to tip over into blandness. (For me, those early albums all tend to blend into one AOR gloop). But there were signs of greatness to come, not least in Knopfler’s burgeoning songwriting ability (Romeo and Juliet from Making Movies being his first unqualified success, a light, dancing creation tempered by a combination of street suss and cynical playfulness worthy of Paul Simon).

Love Over Gold, then, was a change in sound (they ditched the producer and allowed Knopfler to produce on his own) and a leap forward in maturity. While there is an unshakeable whiff of eighties about the whole project (the dread digital gated reverb is in full effect, as well as a track listing in the style of a computer monitor), Love Over Gold’s roots actually lie in » Continue Reading.