One of this town’s dentist used to be a certain Mr Mallet. Perhaps he should have gone into partnership with them?
Anyway a few doors down was the General Post Office, whose head postmaster was a Mr Stamp. And across the road was an estate agent who went by the dubious name of Renton & Renton.
The first job I had was at the Pru in the motor underwriting department 30 years ago. The boss was Derek Anker, and his daughter worked on the floor below.
The poor woman’s name was Wendy, and she always looked so miserable.
Slightly off topic but – I went to school with Hugh Fearnley Whitenstall. We were both in form E and our best friends were Teresa Green and Den Bloom. The caretaker was very proud of his garden and we called him Reg Roses.
I hadn’t seen any of them for ages until a school reunion.
I saw Teresa Green, Reg Roses too, I saw Den Bloom from Form E and Hugh – and I thought to myself ………
I told my Career Guidance Councillor I wanted Cyril’s job on That’s Life. Five minutes a week, comfy chair, autocue, read out a small ad for a gynaecologist called “Fanny N. Spector” with a slightly sleazy leer.. To quote Yozzer Hughes “I could do that”.
(unlike Stilgoe – composer, choreographer, genius wordsmith – who could aspire to that level of magnificence?)
And Cyril looked like he was almost ready for his retirement cottage..
Then that Doc Cox sneaked in ahead of me. The twat.
There was a pharmacy in Ballymun, Dublin where I grew up called “O’Dea’s”. No doubt the irony wasn’t lost on those for whom they facilitated many an overdose.
I can see Dr Thick as maybe being a genuine case of nominative determinism – all those arseholes in the playground giving it to Thickie, every little mistake being picked up on by bastard teachers with a “thick by name..” quip.
Oh, he’s going to be a doctor alright. He’s going to be a doctor in Doogie Howser-quick time. And his waiting room’s always stuffed cos he set up adjacent to Doctor Smellie, and no-one wants to go to him!
Then you’ve got the gardeners on Gardeners Question Time, Bob Flowerdew, Pippa Greenwood, Bunny Guinness, plus there was Clay Jones and Bill Sowerbutts.
Who?
Wright Hassall, Solicitors
I hope you’re not. I hope you’re not a right hassle I mean!
Oh! No, no we’re not ha ha ha!! No, that’s very good.
You must get that a lot!
Oh, you know, I have heard it, yes.
I swear this is true @clive, I too had a Dr Stretch but he was the junior gynaecologist looking after me, whose surgeon was Mr Anthony. He was nowhere near as funny…
We have a local accountant called Rob Swindell. Actual! ❤️
Back to the OP, but how are stretch and dentistry related? (I struggle even with gynae, but)
So, in the possibly post modern spirit, my solicitor is called Mr Dentist.
A building firm doing some work up the road from me:
Top Mix
noe, it may just be the name of the concrete they are using, or perhaps they are just propagating the cliche/borderline racism that all builders are Irish
Many years ago I worked for a little local electrical contractor and we were hired by Newham Council to do some electrical testing on some new-build houses, wired by a firm called Red Indian Electricians. All of their sparks wore red boiler suits with a large indian chief logo on the back and the slogan “Red Indian Electricians – No Cowboys”.
Almost as soon as we arrived on site, their boss offered our boss a great big spliff (as it’s known amongst the cognoscenti) which he obviously declined, wishing to keep things on a strictly professional footing.
We tested their work and it was of a very good standard and obviously therefore passed.
We’ve got a weather girl in the midlands called Sara Blizzard.
I one went out to bat for my cricket team with a mate of mine who’s a partner in a law firm. One of our number pithily observed, to great hilarity, “Look at that. An accountant called Rob and a lawyer called Rich…”
When I was at school I briefly played in a band with a drummer called Bob Clouter, later of Legend, Lew Lewis Band, Mickey Jupp and suchlike Southend luminaries.
In one of the big London firms there’s a well known [in his field] solicitor named Ian Doolittle. I always used to do a comedy double-take when I saw “I. Doolittle” next to his chargeable hours on the invoice.
You were so chuffed you wrote the song Wonderful Life. (And now you follow your own motto that “there’s no need to run and hide” by using your real name on this site..)
Is it true what they say about people with big noses wrt penis size?
Harry Tufnell says
As a student nurse I worked alongside Student Nurse Nurse for a short while.
Gatz says
My dad is a church organist and used to play at a church presided over by the Revd Virtue.
madfox says
I’m a doctor. One of my patients is called Ivor Norrible-Payne.
GCU Grey Area says
There’s a firm of builders in Dorset called Crumbleholme.
One of the dentists in the town I grew up in was a partnership – Nock and Naylor.
JQW says
One of this town’s dentist used to be a certain Mr Mallet. Perhaps he should have gone into partnership with them?
Anyway a few doors down was the General Post Office, whose head postmaster was a Mr Stamp. And across the road was an estate agent who went by the dubious name of Renton & Renton.
GCU Grey Area says
There is a gentleman in a town nearby called Wayne Anker.
Never met the chap, but he has my sympathy. . .
IanP says
The first job I had was at the Pru in the motor underwriting department 30 years ago. The boss was Derek Anker, and his daughter worked on the floor below.
The poor woman’s name was Wendy, and she always looked so miserable.
Gatz says
And famously the editor of The Dandy used to be a man called Euan Kerr.
Sniffity says
A late friend’s chiropractor was Dr Supple….and I gave wide berth to local dentist Dr De’ath.
And as I’ve mentioned before, I worked in a place where Elvis worked in Accounts – he left the building every day.
Milkybarnick says
One of the people who worked in the finance department when I was at university was a Mr Wedge.
Geoffbs7 says
Slightly off topic but – I went to school with Hugh Fearnley Whitenstall. We were both in form E and our best friends were Teresa Green and Den Bloom. The caretaker was very proud of his garden and we called him Reg Roses.
I hadn’t seen any of them for ages until a school reunion.
I saw Teresa Green, Reg Roses too, I saw Den Bloom from Form E and Hugh – and I thought to myself ………
Matthew Best says
… what a wonderful post!
Timbar says
I saw a Urologist called Dr Dick ten years ago
mikethep says
I have encountered urologists called Mr Cox and Mr Winkle. Urology is obviously a fruitful area of study…
Matthew Best says
I know quite a few people in Austin, Texas who had their vasectomies done by Dr Dick Chopp.
http://www.urologyteam.com/dr-richard-chopp
Sewer Robot says
I told my Career Guidance Councillor I wanted Cyril’s job on That’s Life. Five minutes a week, comfy chair, autocue, read out a small ad for a gynaecologist called “Fanny N. Spector” with a slightly sleazy leer.. To quote Yozzer Hughes “I could do that”.
(unlike Stilgoe – composer, choreographer, genius wordsmith – who could aspire to that level of magnificence?)
And Cyril looked like he was almost ready for his retirement cottage..
Then that Doc Cox sneaked in ahead of me. The twat.
MC Escher says
There is a firm of property developers in my area called Ayers & Cruiks. You have to admit they’ve got some bottle.
Bamber says
There was a pharmacy in Ballymun, Dublin where I grew up called “O’Dea’s”. No doubt the irony wasn’t lost on those for whom they facilitated many an overdose.
dai says
Not exactly the same, but two consecutive doctors I had were named Dr Smellie and Dr Thick!
retropath2 says
In my experience a lot of Drs are smelly and thick, but then I know a lot of ’em.
Sewer Robot says
I can see Dr Thick as maybe being a genuine case of nominative determinism – all those arseholes in the playground giving it to Thickie, every little mistake being picked up on by bastard teachers with a “thick by name..” quip.
Oh, he’s going to be a doctor alright. He’s going to be a doctor in Doogie Howser-quick time. And his waiting room’s always stuffed cos he set up adjacent to Doctor Smellie, and no-one wants to go to him!
hubert rawlinson says
I work with someone who teaches business studies, his name is S Crow.
Plus there was a local gynaecologist called Jenny Taylor.
Gatz says
I used to know a Jenny Turl. Sadly for nominative determinism fans she was a teacher.
Leedsboy says
I used to work at a company who had an internal auditor called Mr Ferret.
hubert rawlinson says
Then you’ve got the gardeners on Gardeners Question Time, Bob Flowerdew, Pippa Greenwood, Bunny Guinness, plus there was Clay Jones and Bill Sowerbutts.
Jim Cain says
Aussie racing driver Max Power.
Kid Dynamite says
From today’s Popbitch mail out:
The barrister representing the
abuse claimants against Jimmy
Savile’s estate is named…
Piers Feltham.
niscum says
My favourite firm of solicitors: Wright Hassall
Every call made was:
Who?
Wright Hassall, Solicitors
I hope you’re not. I hope you’re not a right hassle I mean!
Oh! No, no we’re not ha ha ha!! No, that’s very good.
You must get that a lot!
Oh, you know, I have heard it, yes.
count jim moriarty says
When U was knee high to a grasshopper, our local plumber was W.E. Pipe.
count jim moriarty says
That’s I, not U!
todayoutof10 says
I swear this is true @clive, I too had a Dr Stretch but he was the junior gynaecologist looking after me, whose surgeon was Mr Anthony. He was nowhere near as funny…
We have a local accountant called Rob Swindell. Actual! ❤️
ivylander says
I seem to recall a local weather reporter named Linda Freeze…
retropath2 says
Back to the OP, but how are stretch and dentistry related? (I struggle even with gynae, but)
So, in the possibly post modern spirit, my solicitor is called Mr Dentist.
mojitojoe says
not quite what the post’s about…… but my last doctor in Livingston, Scotland was Doctor Pepper.
Rigid Digit says
A building firm doing some work up the road from me:
Top Mix
noe, it may just be the name of the concrete they are using, or perhaps they are just propagating the cliche/borderline racism that all builders are Irish
Mike_H says
Used to see Readymix concrete trucks around North London from a firm called “Jim’ll Mix It”. Not seen them recently…
About 10-12 years ago I used to see a green builders’ van parked in Abbots Langley, Herts with “Thunderbuild 2” emblazoned down the side.
man.of.soup says
Off topic but: I once saw a van in Leicester’s Belgrave Road (aka Little India) once for a firm of British-Indian Builders.
Slogan on the side of the van:
“You’ve tried the cowboys – now try the Indians!”
Mike_H says
Many years ago I worked for a little local electrical contractor and we were hired by Newham Council to do some electrical testing on some new-build houses, wired by a firm called Red Indian Electricians. All of their sparks wore red boiler suits with a large indian chief logo on the back and the slogan “Red Indian Electricians – No Cowboys”.
Almost as soon as we arrived on site, their boss offered our boss a great big spliff (as it’s known amongst the cognoscenti) which he obviously declined, wishing to keep things on a strictly professional footing.
We tested their work and it was of a very good standard and obviously therefore passed.
bobness says
We’ve got a weather girl in the midlands called Sara Blizzard.
I one went out to bat for my cricket team with a mate of mine who’s a partner in a law firm. One of our number pithily observed, to great hilarity, “Look at that. An accountant called Rob and a lawyer called Rich…”
mr.apollo says
when I was’t lad, my local gp’s surgery was run by doctor payne- james and doctor de’ath. pain and death. seemed apt, I stayed healthy.
JQW says
How about this potential supergroup:
Guitar – Steven Fretwell
Piano – Alicia Keys
Drums – Chad Wackerman
Bass – Colin Bass
Saxophone – Jim Horn
mikethep says
When I was at school I briefly played in a band with a drummer called Bob Clouter, later of Legend, Lew Lewis Band, Mickey Jupp and suchlike Southend luminaries.
mikethep says
There’s a firm of solicitors in Kidderminster called Doolittle and Dalley.
Jeff says
In one of the big London firms there’s a well known [in his field] solicitor named Ian Doolittle. I always used to do a comedy double-take when I saw “I. Doolittle” next to his chargeable hours on the invoice.
JQW says
Chief executive of The Howard League for Penal Reform – Frances Crook
rich says
used to be a dentist in Putney SW London called Dr Phang
hubert rawlinson says
Indeed, as the cover of Pink Floyd’s A Nice pair showa;
http://i1322.photobucket.com/albums/u577/Mrpolly/floyd_zpsi9mv4hd5.jpg
Black Celebration says
My Afterword name is my real name. Imagine my surprise when my favourite band named one of their albums after me..
Sewer Robot says
You were so chuffed you wrote the song Wonderful Life. (And now you follow your own motto that “there’s no need to run and hide” by using your real name on this site..)
Is it true what they say about people with big noses wrt penis size?
Black Celebration says
No idea, but they can both make one hell of a mess.
ivylander says
Has anyone here read ‘Ahead of Your Time: A Guide to End-of-Life Planning’ by Dick and Sue Coffin? It exists.
Jeff says
There’s a French Moroccan poster on the Afterword called Norman Atif de Terminisme.
bogl says
Late to the party:
E Sockett – all things electrical shop where I was brought up
Mr Payne – dentist