Dave Amitri on The Book
First things first my little book (almost a pamphlet) is now available to buy from Lulu.com (link below). I have absolutely no expectations about how many will sell, that was really never the point. This whole thing has been a project for me. A man with the attention span of a goldfish, as much resilience as a piece of damp bog paper and the motivation of a lazy sloth has actually finished something. My basic laziness and lack of focus on anything that didn’t involve a football meant school was a huge wasted opportunity and two years at college a complete waste of time. 10 CSE’s (remember them?) All D or lower and 4 O levels eventually all C or lower. I can’t blame the teachers, or my parents God knows they tried. One incident sums up just how frustrating I must have been. In about 1978 I had an English teacher called Mr Sharpe. An older chap, slightly eccentric but passionate about the English language and how it was used. I barely remember any other teacher’s name who taught me throughout school. One day he stopped the class and told everyone that he’d received a piece of homework that he wanted to share and read to the class. To my surprise it was mine. I’d written something about a kid who’d been on holiday with his family and dog and returned a year later to find all his favourite places were now part of a new road build. I’ve no idea where it came from or why I’d finished a piece of homework and handed it in. I suspect both my Dad and Mr Sharpe had input along the way. None of that mattered, I was mortified, for ten minutes I was centre of attention and I wasn’t wearing a football kit. I had no idea how to deal with it I just knew I could never risk it happening again. I got an A+ and my Dad almost exploded with wasted pride. He could never understand why it was never repeated. I just started making Mr Sharpe cross at my lack of effort but I was safe back in the shadows of obscurity. The only other thing of note that happened at that time was a girl in class mentioned in passing that my hair made me look like David Soul. More horror, I didn’t want anyone noticing me. From that moment I figured that letting my hair grow imperceptibly left me unnoticed until mum made me get it cut. It meant I would only be noticed very rarely and recieve a few “ooooh haircut” comments until the next time. It’s a policy I still follow today. Anyway, I digress. Back to the book. It’s done, I’ve received the proof copy and it’s available for sale. It’s as it was here with some comments and a new introduction.
For those interested in the process of self publishing I’ve learned a lot and I’m happy to share.
I’m lucky that the chap who runs Toppermost is a retired editor and he offered to proof read. He found plenty of errors and typos. He has helped other self publishers and put me in touch with a few for advice. My own searches had found plenty of self publishing houses but all wanted a range of cash up front and a print run with the potential of a “Bouncing Back” style unsold book mountain. There was no way I was paying anyone £5k upfront nor asking anyone to crowdfund for what was already available on the internet. Lulu.com was suggested to me and a quick scan of their website and I was in.
After I’d put it all together in one document with the comments it was time to think about the cover. I’d been trying to track down the rights of the Bowie albums cover artwork but it became impossible apart from The Duffy Archive who were incredibly helpful but wouldn’t let me use Aladdin Sane as the cover. So I took a punt on Stuff_By_Mark an artist I know from Twitter who is an extremely talented cartoonist who had done lots of Bowie drawings. He agreed to help, I chose my cover, he did the design, I paid a nominal licensing fee and my cover was done. It’s the best part of the book to be honest.
So I had my manuscript, my cover and my self publishing platform. A bit about Lulu here. They are a US based publisher with partners around the world. They offer this fantastic platform and high quality print on demand self publishing literally anywhere but they demand a particular format for upload of print and illustration. I learned all about flattening a PDF, embedding fonts, page sizes, margins, bleed areas, etc. Making Mark’s design fit in their cover design tool was a nightmare. I needed to add the wording on the back, the spine, the back colour. It all took hours to get right. Then and only then can you start thinking about copyright, ISBNs and pricing. Phew! Is this really worth the hassle I asked myself more than once. But I rallied and cracked on. There was a copyright page template, perfect. They supply a free ISBN, brilliant. Now the pricing.
You choose, page size, cover type (I went paperback) paper quality, gloss or matte cover and Lulu give you a print cost. From that you decide your price without shipping, that only comes when a punter checks out. It will clearly depend on where you’re ordering from although it will come from one of Lulu’s local network. Lulu take the print cost and a percentage of your profit margin. They give you an option of global distribution via the likes of Amazon but this has added distribution costs. So it really makes it far too expensive especially for a little book like mine. I’ll post a link to the blog that explains it better than I can. A nightmare if you’re looking for a million seller, no biggie if you’re just ticking off a bucket list. It’s a huge faff overall but now I’ve done it once the second time would be much, much easier.
Once all that is done you have to send for a proof copy which you pay for. Mine arrived today. Like my ex wife always said there’s less of it than I’d hoped (I’d expected more from 28000 words). It looks really good (my ex wife never said that). I’d forgotten to put my name on the front. You’re an arsehole Dave (my ex wife’s favourite phrase). Anyway. Its all adjusted now, I’ve approved it and it’s on sale now. My book. Publicising it is all on me.
I’m not sure what Mr Sharpe thought of David Bowie but I think he probably thought quite well of me even though I gave him very few reasons to. The fact that I still remember him choosing what I’d written is perhaps a sign that it made a bigger impact than just making run for cover. Maybe he lit an ember that’s burned ever since and only now has it sparked into life. It’s not War and Peace, it’s barely a book but it’s my book. Mine. Me. Dave Ross.
Dave Ross says
https://www.lulu.com/en/gb/shop/dave-ross/12-bowie-albums-in-12-months/paperback/product-mr2zmn.html?page=1&pageSize=4
Freddy Steady says
Fucking hell Dave, you’ve done it!!
Bingo Little says
This is great stuff; major congratulations, Dave.
davebigpicture says
Congratulations Dave.
Black Celebration says
I love the cover. He’s in his Life on Mars suit and sitting on a Space Hopper, which every household seemed to have in the 70s, which neatly aligns with the era discussed by the book.
Were you tempted to flesh it out with an accompanying personal narrative to show how Dave Ross ch-ch-changed ?
Rigid Digit says
Congratulations on getting it out there Dave
niallb says
Brilliant! So chuffed for you.
mikethep says
Brilliant, well done! Speaking as a semi-retired editor, I’m glad you found one.
Tiggerlion says
Bravo!!!
fentonsteve says
Ordered.
Well done, Dave.
bang em in bingham says
Great stuff Dave, well deserved…fingers crossed for mucho success..
MC Escher says
Well done, sir. Fantastic effort.
hedgepig says
Congratulations Dave!
Vulpes Vulpes says
Sterling stuff Dave – I’m looking forward to (re-)reading your reviews and the extra stuff you’ve added – I’ll have my pile of Bowie albums at the ready!
fitterstoke says
Purchased – congratulations, Dave!
Arthur Cowslip says
Yay!
Hoops McCann says
Ordered!
dai says
Your surname isn’t Amitri?
Congrats on the book
Andrew says
Presumably he’s been hiding his real name so no one realises he created the Daleks.
Loved reading each of the Bowie posts. Book ordered!
Twang says
Well done Dave. Anyone being creative in their bedroom gets my vote!
Moose the Mooche says
Oh I say.
TrypF says
Great work Dave. Best of luck with this.
Locust says
Congratulations – well done and good luck!
pawsforthought says
Well done, that’s amazing. Book duly ordered!
Lodestone of Wrongness says
Congrats!
Dave Ross says
Bit of an update. I sold a few books through Lulu. Thanks to anyone who did buy one especially as it was all available online. As I said it was never about selling loads. Anyway I’ve now given permission for full distribution which basically means it can be sold on any seller that wants it. Absolutely bugger all in it financially for me ( never the point ) but this still feels all kinds of crazy. My little book is on Amazon. For £2.50 more than Lulu by the way