What does it sound like?:
It sounds like a bargain! How many of us music enthusiasts on this music-based site have had to put up with a salt shaker that doesn’t play our favourite music? I know I have. Well, no longer. The NEW! SMALT is the answer to our prayers. Not only does it have a crisp and powerful bluetooth speaker to stream your Steve Howe outtake compilations, it also help you monitor your sodium intake by letting you choose the amount of salt you desire which it will dispense into a small, removable tray. It’s easy and SMALT does all the measuring for you!
You know how shaking a boring old-fashioned fist-mounted salt pot up and down makes you look like a wanker, right? Well no more. With NEW! SMALT’s interactive connectivity and easy-to-use app, you can dazzle your friends by whipping out your phone and pouring your salt with it. You can shake your phone and salt comes out! Of the SMALT, not the phone. And you still look like a wanker! They haven’t thought this through.
And here’s another bonus! The SMALT includes ambient mood lighting for those special occasions when you want to entertain your friends outside. (Note to Afterworders: ‘Outside’ is that big room with the high ceiling where you never go. ‘Friends’ are complex software bundles which come pre-loaded in a meat-based droid.) SMALT can be used with iOS and Android and is compatible with Alexa, so there’s more than one way to have fun and interact with this versatile salt-dispensing centrepiece!
What does it all *mean*?
It means you can get two (2) SMALT Interactive Centerpieces in White. Keep one for yourself and give one to a friend or family member. You can also keep one in the kitchen for while you cook and one in the place where you dine. Either way; SMALT is fun no matter where you interact with it! See details for shipping costs. Ships March 2018.
Goes well with…
Having waaaay too much money
Might suit people who like…
The Internet of Things. Slow Fridays.