The Independent and other news media are reporting that London is to get its first restaurant to cater for naked patrons. “Finally”, I hear you cry. Apparently it’s a pop-up restaurant…ooer. Alas it’s not going to be called ‘Starkers’ or ‘Raw’. It will be known as The Bunyadi.
No word on the menu yet. What should we expect? Will The Naked Chef be setting the menu? Will only the salads be dressed? Will they even be tossed? Will waiters don birthday suits? Will waitresses only wear a smile? Should I assume my waitress will be expecting a large tip?
I think we can assume all breast meat will be served with extra crispy skin. That said, will they risk flambèing Crêpes Suzette at your table and should I assume it’s buckwheat in the pancake mix? If it’s posh they’ll serve fish cakes with a parsley sauce. If not it’ll be fish fingers covered in some nondescript creamy white finishing sauce. Either works for me.
If there’s a large queue for the toilets then I’d give the Cock-A-Leekie soup a wide berth. I’m hoping a personal favourite of mine, Coq au Vin, will be on the menu but if it’s a dinner date I’d be recommending to my date the Toad in the Hole and, if she’s still not stuffed, I’d suggest some Spotted Dick for afters. If it’s a double date a sharing platter with plenty of titbits to nibble on followed by a Jam Roly Poly would be the order of the day.